Embrace the foot sex by learning how to give a footjob and support the partner who has foot fetishism.
It’s a beautiful thing, and this guide condenses the lessons from hundreds of couples who have shared their best tips on forums. Become closer with your partner than ever before!
Footjobs and foot fetishes usually go hand in hand.
While foot fetish usually is about a partner loving your feet or even worshipping them…
Then footjob is about you giving the blowjob type of experience to your partner’s penis…! 🙂
It’s definitely not easy and it’s very hard to get any man cum from it…but I’m sure someone with foot fetish will appreciate the effort either way.
Plus, you can always cheat and include your hands in the process 🙂
But here are the best tips:
#1 —Get a Pedicure: Beautiful Feet Are Key To Great Footjob!
If you’ll surprise him with freshly done feet, he’ll love you all the more.
Since footjobs are less about sensations, but more about visual pleasure nicely done nails and feet are key ingredient.
If you’re doing your own feet, getting this pedicure doll kit will do the job… 🙂
Make sure he gets to observe the feet beautifying process though!
#2 — Strategically Position Your Feet While Giving Him A Blowjob
Since your guy has a foot fetish, why not pick positions where your feet are close to his face? 🙂
He’ll appreciate it!
Also you can simply lay next to each other while providing easy access for the feet even without a blowjob.
Let him suck and lick the feet: a free foot massage every time!
How To Actually Give A Footjob?
First of all, it’s tough.
Your feet will get tired quickly if you’re the one doing the up and down motion.
But you can let him do the work!
Lay down on your back, lift your legs, bend your knees and even let him hold your legs so you don’t get tired.
Then he can go to town by thrusting his penis between your feet while enjoying the view…!
Just know that reality doesn’t look like it does in porn.
Which leads me to the next point.
Instead of reading textual tips…or checking pictures just go to any free porn site and type in the search box “footjob”.
That will be so much easier way to learn tons of techniques than asking here while trying to visualise how it could look like…!
And talking about pornstars, watch this video of them explaining how to give a perfect footjob (plus, how to practice):
What Are Different Foot Fetishes?
“As a man with a foot fetish I can tell you that the excitement from receiving a footjob may lower the amount of time it takes him to cum.
Find out what he likes.
Some of us like the soles of a woman’s foot, some like the toes, some only the tops, some just nail polish, socks etc.
Find out what he likes and use that part to pleasure him with.
For example if it’s the tops, then make sure whatever position you are in shows off the tops of your feet.
For many men smell is a huge factor.
So allowing him to smell your feet while having sex with him.
Allowing him to kiss or lick your feet could be a turn on as well.
I can’t reiterate this enough, there are many different foot fetishes that exist, so make sure you know what he likes.
Here’s a small list:
clean feet
dirty feet
sexy heels
trampling
fem Dom / foot worship
footjob
big feet
small feet
socks
stockings
ankle jewelry
Once you know what he likes, only do that thing. Chances are he knows what he wants since it is his fetish.
Tips for you to give a good footjob:
lots of oil (coconut works well)
fast doesn’t mean better (sometimes a slow moving sole can feel better than jack hammering as fast as possible)
run your toes from the base of his shaft to the head.
don’t focus so much on the toes! Some girls imagine a foot fetish to only include the toes for some reason. Use your whole foot. Top bottom sides and toes.
when he gets close don’t speed up or slow down all of a sudden. Just stay at a steady pace.
feel free to use your hands a little while giving a footjob. (And I mean a little, don’t use it as an out because your legs are tired)
put a stiff pillow under your legs to help with fatigue.
if he wants to play with your feet before the footjob, it’s foreplay for him. Even if he’s doing the work.
if it seems right, you can say something like “ I want your cum on my feet” or get more descriptive. “I want you to cum on my toes (soles, tops etc.)”
have fun with it. Indulging your partner in a fetish should be an open, and friendly environment. Try not to make him feel that what he likes is weird. Enjoy what you get to experience with your partner, and grow from it.
#1 — Her sitting Indian style with her feet around your penis with you during Indian style.
#2 — Hey laying on her back, her legs over yours while her get are stroking your penis.
#3 — And her on her stomach, facing away from you, her knees bent and her feet stroking your penis while you’re either standing or kneeling.
“Sexy Ideas For Playing with The Foot Fetish”
There’s several ways to do this.
You lay on your back on a bed/couch, facing him. He lay opposite to you, on his back, facing you. take your feet and capture his dick between then and stroke him that way. It might help to use lotion or lube of some kind. You can break the stroke just to rub his dick/balls with your foot but the magic is in the stroking. Mind you this position will be the hardest on you. It’s like doing a hundred+ mini-leg-lifts.
The easiest way if you two to be opposite ends of a bed/couch/floor, and he on his back facing you, but you on your stomach facing him. Your legs move in a much more nature way this way as that’s the way your knees bend.
Another way is to have him lie on the floor alongside a bed or couch, you on the bed/couch, place your feet in his face and make him suck/lick while you jerk him off or he rubs one out himself.
Have him paint your toe nails
toe rings, sexy high heels, nylons/pantyhose of some kind — bring this stuff into play and jerk him off with your fee with these on or have him jerk off on them while you where them.
reverse cowgirl, but lean forward and stick your feet out so they’re in his face.
if you want to drive him insane? Lick his cum off your feet after he explodes on them.”
“Here’s what I do, I’m not like a pro or anything but I feel like I’ve gotten pretty good at it over time.
Get some good silicone lube.
Just like for anal your feet don’t self lubricate so something that stay’s slippery on it’s own is super important.
Then sit facing each other on the bed or wherever.
I usually start by blowing him a bit then move to the foot job after I’ve gotten him hard that way.
Lube up his penis really good and then place the bottoms of your feet on both sides of his penis and start with some long strokes.
I’ll then usually focus occasionally more directly on his head using the pads of my toes to play with the ridge around the head a bit or put my big toe on his frenulum and play with that a bit by putting pressure on it and rubbing in circles.
I usually get tired fairly fast so I’ll often use my hands on my feet to sort of help keep the motion up and direct the action a bit.
If you’re bendy enough it’s also fun to keep your feet on the base of his penis and then get your mouth on his penis and suck him a bit periodically give’s your legs a break.
I actually usually finish that way with my boyfriend since he’s got a swallowing fetish too.
But I know some guys like to see their cum all over your feet and toes so he may not want to finish in your mouth.
Also as you obviously already know, taking care of your feet and having your nails done just sort of completes the whole thing visually.
My boyfriend is basically obsessed with my nails being done.
Bonus feature is that I haven’t paid for my nails to be done in years and since he’ll suggest colors I always know he’s going to like what I’m having done.”
Other People Foot Fetish & FootJob Stories: How It Works In Real Relationships
“I have a decent foot fetish. My wife gives me a foot job here and there as foreplay. “
“But what gets us both off is when I go down on her, l lay with my hips facing one of her feet.
She will extend her leg and rub me as I’m eating her.
She’ll bend her other leg and raise her ass (sometimes we use a butt plug) so I can still get in there good as well as get in some anal play (which I know she enjoys as well).
After a little bit, I’ll get on my knees and elbows, she will hook her legs on the outside of my arms and give me the ol’ two footer using her toes.
It allows me to concentrate on her clit as well as have a leverage point to tweak her nipples.
It takes some practice to get the balance on his part, but its worth the time for you both.
It was hard for me to bring this foot fetish to my wife’s attention.
“Tribadism or tribbing, commonly known by its scissoring position, is a sex act in which a woman rubs her vulva against her partner’s body for sexual stimulation, especially for ample stimulation of the clitoris.
This may involve female-to-female genital contact or a female rubbing her vulva against her partner’s thigh, stomach, buttocks, arm, or other body part (excluding the mouth).”
If you want to go into devilish details this is a great video by Stevie explaining the different terms and positions:
Which leads us to the next question…
Does tribbing really feels as good as it looks?
Porn makes scissoring look super attractive — but is it really so?
In porn they need to make it look visually good and tribbing or scissoring gives that.
But it really depends from you both if you’ll enjoy tribbing.
For example:
it depends from the size of pussy and clit…how exposed it is for external rubbing?
can you find easy to align position?
are you both hairy down there or super clean shaven? Otherwise it will get itchy fast. You need either super clean or super hairy to enjoy
how plastic are you? If you love yoga and are plastic it could make a difference! Otherwise the hotness will quickly turn to pain and cramps in your butt and legs.
But enough from me, here are 3 different responses from other ladies… on their thoughts on how pleasant or real scissoring actually is:
“I’ve heard so many people, including lesbians, say that scissoring is a myth. I can assure you, it is not. “
“Not everyone is able to get into position properly, it can be awkward, but when you fit right together and get a rhythm going it is fantastic!
The position isn’t going to be just like porn, but let’s face it, lesbian porn is usually not very accurate.”
Scissoring is not real. It’s just a thing from porn. You’d THINK it’d work but it’s not supppsed to.
Most of the time we “take turns” giving and receiving. That’s usually the easiest way.
Simultaneous pleasuring is a lil tricky, but it’s possible! You just gotta work for it 😉 I personally like grinding on a sharp area (like hip bone or knee) while pleasuring my partner. There are also sex toys geared towards women couples designed to stimulate both partners at once. Find a queer-friendly sex toy store; there’s tons online.
Read “Girl Sex 101” by KD Diamond and Allison Moon. It is THE most comprehensive how-to sex book for women and people who have sex with women. Honestly, straight people should read it too. It’s like a friggin’ textbook and teaches you ALL the things!”
“I always thought tribbing to be fake…till one day..”
“I was someone who always mocked scissoring for the longest time as the cheesiest lesbian act…
I always assumed it was just done for the sake of male porn viewers and didn’t actually provide any stimulation to the women involved.
Fast forward to a lazy afternoon with two naked ladies who’d been fucking all morning, one of whom was me.
I playfully got between my lady’s legs and began to grind against her.
I never expected it to work so well, but:
between the slickness of our previous orgasms,
the arousal at mingling our sex juices,
and the strategic pelvic positioning that resulted in perfect pressure on our clits…
… Made us both have insane orgasms that time and many times after.
Granted, your mileage may vary — it’s worked better with some women, less well with others, and it’s never the only sex act done in a night of sexual interaction.
Okay, so this is the most famous strapless strapon from Tantus.
There are four different Feeldoe models: classic, slim, stout and more. The only difference between them is how long and how girthy it is.
The model below is the most popular one being 6″ length and 4.25″ girth.
You can pick through longer but thinner, and shorter but girthier models.
The reason strapless strapons are so popular is because they are being inserted in woman’s vagina + there is vibrator that will provide pleasant sensations for both sides of the couple.
Watch this helpful demo video to see how Feeldoe looks like (in the video they review Feeldoe Classic, the medium size strapon):
Other Women Tribbing Experiences, Tips and Positions
Read these stories to learn more on how the experience might look and feel like.
Very insightful:
“I’ve done scissoring a few times.”
“It can be great but mostly it’s just a lot of exercise without a comparable amount of pleasure.
That said, there have been a few times with the right woman that it has been great.
So I think while its rare it can be awesome.
It really depends of physical and mental chemistry.
“I’ll try to give an explanation from my experience.
When some girls start masturbating at an age where they don’t know what it means yet, they’ll straddle something (usually a stuffed animal) and press their clit against it to stimulate themselves.
A friend of mine admits to doing this and I did something similar.
This was how we learned how to orgasm, and it’s a much different feeling than direct clitoral stimulation.
We’ve had sex before and when I had a hard time getting her off, we would scissor because it’s easier for her to orgasm that way.
I haven’t been able to teach my body to orgasm through anything other than that specific kind of masturbation.
Scissoring doesn’t do anything for me, but it was perfect for her.”
“You’d have to be a girl that gets off VERY easily and from not much stimulation to get off from that, because it just doesn’t seem like it would provide much direct stimulation.
I mean, I can’t get off grinding my boyfriend like that, even though I enjoy it (and grinding against a hard penis would provide more physical, direct stimulation to the clit than grinding against a female).
That said, I think it can be pretty hot, and I enjoy watching it in porn.”
Source: Anonymous
“Every woman has a different kind of vulva. “
“Some women have very small clits, some have very large ones, and the same goes for labia.
The shape of the vulva determines whether tribbing can feel good.
Some women can really enjoy it, but many others just can’t. It’s important for two women to be compatible when they try it.
It’s very popular in porn, because it allows the viewer to see the entire body of both women.
However, this is also a disadvantage: there’s no hugging and no kissing during the act, which for some people makes it less intimate than they would like.
It can also be a bit difficult to coordinate the movements.
It’s a very exhausting sex act that uses a lot of different muscles, which makes it close to impossible for many women who don’t train those muscles regularly.
And because some women get too sensitive for more stimulation after orgasm, it can leave one partner wanting more when the other is already “done”.
Some lesbian women enjoy tribbing and do it often.
Others don’t care for it at all.
Like all sex acts, it’s a very individual thing. :)”
The right BDSM test will let you understand what and why you are attracted to certain naughty things. These tests are great to take with the partner or by yourself.
Knowing thyself is key to satisfying sex life and finding the right partner to share these kinks. The list below includes all the best kink quizzes ever published online:
What You’re About To Learn
The best will mean different things to different people which is why I included several tests for you to check and also discussed the list of kinks separately.
Explore different plays, keep an open mind and you’ll have the most satisfying and orgasmic love life.
If you think you’re the fucked up one for having such dirty fantasies, you’re not.
Just join the communities and you’ll see how to have tons of BDSM fun in a safe, respectful and consensual way. Good luck:
This test helps you to learn your dominant sexual archetype.
You’ll learn how you naturally get turned off, aroused and what are the kinks you are most likely to enjoy.
It’s very important to know also how your partner is getting aroused and what kind of kinks he is most likely to enjoy.
If you and your partner take this test together, it’s a great chance to start a conversation about this and learn tons about each other.
This is the results page of Kinky Adventurer sexual archetype for example:
For example, I am Kinky Adventurer and my girlfriend turned out to be Tantra Lover. It means I like more of the sexy roleplay and am aroused by new, exciting scenes.
For her, as Tantra Lover, the connection is very important. She requires a full-presence, sensual foreplay, and more careful handling.
I didn’t know these things before… so when I implemented them in our foreplay… she surprisingly got kinkier during the sex.
Because I was speaking her language, she was more interested in learning mine too.
No list would be complete without mentioning the BDSM granddaddy to the list. This is the most advanced test you’ll be able to take.
You’ll be asked a list of questions about different kinks that you might like or not.
The end result looks like this:
As you see you’ll quickly be introduced to different terms from the BDSM community and presented with ideas to try.
For example, Brat Tamer is someone who likes the playfulness and dirty talk of handling the brat, who needs to be taught a lesson.
Rigger is someone who likes to tie his partner 🙂
And Daddy Dom/Little Girl is a type of roleplay where one person is a caring Daddy, and another person takes the role of a little girl (boy), who’s silly, fooling around…
Let’s Experiment is a cool kink test to take with your partner.
Through playful use of questions, you’ll safely be able to start discussing some more interesting ideas and learn what kind of fetishes each of you might have.
The key here is don’t be ashamed or shy about any fantasies, it’s all good!
Obviously, you need to establish trust and have exciting vanilla sex before you start with extras.
If you’re a man than I can say to you, that once I learned some cool tricks to make her orgasm, she became much more open to more ideas.
If she is the one craving the sex because how incredible you make it, she’ll be much more likely to suggestion!
Could you imagine being able to introduce threesome, if your sex is boring and she’s not confident in you.. and might get jealous?
No way!
However, if you give her so much pleasure and talk about everything, she’ll be so much likely and trusting to try new things.
All because she knows that you’ll be careful with her and would never make her do anything she might not like.
Shibari bondage (it’s basically erotic Japanese bondage..as a sexual art)
Genital chastity, genital restraint (might include chastity belt, cock cage… and just tying it up…)
#2 – Dominance & Submission Play: Daddy Dom & Brat
Power roles are the most popular part of BDSM which everyone practices at some level.
The other term to this is also top and bottom.
It’s D&S part of BDSM letters 🙂
Naturally, men are more dominant, women more submissive. And sex gets exciting when there is POLARITY.
Remove polarity and it loses all its appeal.
This is why you should intentionally practice it for a better love life.
You can also change roles.
For example, I am mostly dominant and my girl is mostly submissive, but she likes to switch from time to time.
And it’s even more fun.
The lightest version of this is DDLG (Daddy Dom, Little Girl) and the most extreme version of this is Master/Slave relationship.
You can also bring this play to the primal level, where you unleash the animalistic desires.
It’s in all of us. We may be civilized, but the bedroom is where we can unleash our animal and throw the logic out of the door.
So to the list…
Are you willing to try:
Being Dominant / Submissive
Ownership
Dirty talk (…you’re my little slut and you love your pussy being pounded like that… I’m gonna make you cum a huge cumshot. Say it: I want you to come for me, Master).
Owning genitals (only I can touch them…! They’re mine!)
But here are 3 levels of power play you can play out:
Hardcore: Master/Slave relationships — you play the complete ownership over his/her body. With collars, contract, human furniture, chastity plays, posture, clothing rules.. etc. Can be lots of fun.
Kinky: You play out some roleplays like DDLG, Policeman/Criminal, Kidnapper/Victim
Vanilla: It’s where you just play with the romantic part of D&S.
#3 — Impact Play: Spanking, Flogging, Lashing
This is where we finish the BDSM title. This is the part of S&M — Sadism, and Masochism.
Don’t get scared by the words though. It all starts with simple spanking 🙂
And everybody enjoys a nice spanking in the right context.
The importance of this obviously is that it must be consensual. You must have clear communication of how far you would like to go.
Again it doesn’t need to be painful. Though pain and pleasure go hand in hand.
So here’s the list, would you be willing to try:
Spanking
Tickling (feathers)
Caning
Whipping
Lashing
Impact play with bondage restraint
Paddling
#4 — The Kinky Sensory Play
This is where you play with all your five senses — sight, taste, sound, touch, and smell.
It’s an easy way to introduce extra variety in your bedroom and an excellent way for foreplay.
Love tapping/ light spanking (the mix of impact and sensory play)
tantric breathing
Play with Sex Toys
There is so much variety that can come from getting new outfits, different stimulators for men or women, or even exploring various dildos – there’s even a dog dildo.
For example for men, you could add a blowjob machine as part of the play.
Toys are the easiest way to spice it up, which is the reason I created the whole website – SexualAlpha to focus on finding the best adult sex toys in one place.
BDSM Communities & Websites You Should Join
Probably the best sex-related communities are on Reddit. It’s where you’ll get the best feedback and serious people wanting to help you.
This is the most serious discussion board for BDSM related questions. If you have questions or you would like to join the discussion this is the #1 place!
This community is a close second, it has nice WIKI page for beginners and is quite kinky 🙂 Similar to BDSM advice, just bigger, but with bigger community comes more noise.
If you’re US-based, you might wanna check out Janus community. It has quite a bit of events (it’s based in San Francisco) and it offers education, mentoring and programs to educate people about BDSM in a safe atmosphere.
Stories From Real BDSM Lifestyle: 5 BDSM Practitioners Share Their Sexual Kink Experiences
To add some color and perspective here are some more real stories from people…good and bad… but from real life…
#1 — My Master made me take an edible without my consent…not sure what to do or what to feel
This one is about dom taking it way too far and not respecting the safe word…
“We have a good dom/sub relationship (we’re also monogamous and dating), we’ve been seeing each other for 8 months and I’ve come to really trust him.
He taught me everything and enforced the stoplight system for safe-wording, he’s been a good dom, never pushed me to do things I didn’t want to.
But last night, I was tied down to the bed and he had me open my mouth, we play around with gags so I thought he was just going to gag me.
He put a piece of chocolate in my mouth and told me it was chocolate, but after I chewed most of it he told me it was an edible and I tried to spit it out, use my safe word, but he made me swallow it.
I’m not opposed to weed at all, we smoke together, but edibles aren’t an easy-to-control high, plus he gave me a higher dosage than I would’ve chosen. I didn’t want to take an edible, we never discussed it.
Later on, he ignored my safe word for being untied, I didn’t want to sleep in his tiny single bed tied up, I normally have always slept on the floor.
It’s not so much that me made me sleep with him, it’s just I was saying red and he was refusing to untie me.
I feel weird today. I feel gross, I’ve never felt gross with him before. I’m not sure what to do.
Later I called him and I told him that I wished he had talked to me before he gave me an edible.
He said he stands by what he did and has no regrets. He said that he had to keep it secret or it would ruin the scene.”
#2 — Rant: being kinky doesn’t disqualify me from being a good parent
“I’m peeved, y’all.
The nature of my relationship with my husband has nothing, nothing to do with whether I’m capable of being a good parent. Your ignorance of BDSM doesn’t excuse your absolute asshattery.
I’m not scarring my children, I’m not damaging my children, and my children are not privy to anything that they shouldn’t be privy to.
My husband is no more likely to be abusive to me, to my children, or to anyone, than anyone else’s husband is, because he’s not abusive, he’s a Dominant.
There are so many children who grow up in truly awful environments. Don’t you dare call CPS on me and start a useless investigation to try to make happy, healthy, well-adjusted children out of a loving home?
Unapologetic story from a man showing the juicy attraction to BDSM 🙂
“I noticed a pattern with my scenes this year. I kept drifting more and more towards degradation, being an asshole and a monster, using women for my sadistic entertainment.
Initially, I used to be way more into the Master-Slave dynamic. I would set out rules and challenges for my sub, wait for them to break the rules, then punish them.
I loved punishing them, but I always felt the need to justify it. It was a compromise between my Yin and Yang — I’d let my darkness out to play, but only if there was a pretense that my light was in control in the background.
SHE broke the rules, so I HAD to punish her.
A few years ago, as a reward for being a good girl, my slave requested a consensual non-consent scene.
She wanted to fight me, and she wanted me to fight for the right to use her. No justification, just the darkness, and fun.
The scene itself was intoxicating, lasting hours. I remember flashes of it from time to time — her eyes in the moment of surrender, breaking the bed frame, laughing at my cock as it managed to keep getting hard like a drunken boxer.
I chase that feeling every time I post a CNC ad.
I kept meeting up with women that wanted to be called sluts. In Los Angeles, I put her in a harness and fucked in the back of a van. In Orlando, I didn’t let her say a word until I came in her mouth, then I forced my way into her ass.
In New Orleans, I strapped a Hitachi to her clit and wrote over her tied-up body. In Las Vegas, I made her cum in the hotel pool and try on lingerie for me inside a sex shop.
In New York, I dragged her around my hotel room in a headlock and slapped her face.
They’re all beautiful, amazing women, full of agency and career-driven. They’re talented, friendly, kind and wonderful. I respect these women with every fiber of my being.
And I won’t hesitate to use them as three warm holes for fucking, choking, slapping or abusing.
I’ll cum on them. I’ll spit on them. I’ll write about them.
I’ll tie them up and take pictures of their little slutty bodies.
I will strip away everything human about them and make them into mindless fucktoys.
I will turn them into something best referred to as an “it.”
An object.
Because during this scene, I don’t just strip away their humanity. I also shed away their stresses, their responsibilities, their schedules, their expectations. Fucktoys have none of that.
Do you have a meeting on Monday where the boss is going to try and undermine you? That sucks. But right now you’re fuckmeat, and your only problem is you’re going to be choked harder.
Worked up about how the world expects you to be a perfect woman and mom and wife and warrior and healer? I don’t fucking care. I expect you to be a good little cumslut.
In some aspects, yes, we’re poking at the taboo of how men and women should treat each other.
My darkness, left unchecked, is a monster. If I acted on my urge, I would be in jail.
But playing with it this way, I’m letting my light side make a set of rules to contain it.
It’s a lot like a zoo building a better ape habitat.
Yes, the apes are still in a zoo, but with more space and things to do, they’re happier.
So I’ll call you a slut, a whore, a fucktoy, a cunt. I’ll use you. I’ll expose you, degrade you and fuck you. And I’ll respect the fuck out of you, you slut.”
“In my opinion, people often over-emphasise the importance of a safe word.
The problem is, a safe word can create a false sense of security.
They’re like seat belts, they’re great to have but that doesn’t mean we can drive carelessly.
It’s better to minimize the need for a safe word by properly discussing limits ahead of time.
In my experience, if you’re relying on a safe word then you’re probably doing something wrong.
The only time a safe word is really necessary is during consensual non-consent scenes where the submissive wants to be able to say things like No, Stop, Please Stop, You’re hurting me.
In other words, pretend rape. In any other situation, stop means stop so there should be no need for a safe word.
For intense scenes like rape-play, a safe word is still not enough. Things can easily get so intense that the “victim” can’t think straight.
Of course a safe word is useless when I have my dick in her mouth, or my hands around her neck, or her face shoved into a pillow so she can’t scream. (or he if that’s your gender preference).
In normal situations a safe word is unnecessary and in extreme situations a safe word is unreliable so why bother?
I’ve been doing this BDSM thing a long time now. Not just BDSM, I’ve done all sorts of risky, extreme, unusual things.
I try to be careful but life is short and sometimes some risk is totally worth it. I’m proud to say that not once has anyone ever felt the need to use a safe word with me. Not until yesterday.
The thing is, we weren’t even doing anything that extreme. Neither of us was naked so by many standards, it wasn’t even sex.
We’ve done far more before and this particular encounter was not much more than flirting.
Granted, I was in a very dominant mood and I am far stronger than her so my “flirting” meant my hands were all over her and there’s no way she could get away. I have no doubt that she was enjoying it and wanted more.
I know the difference between her saying “Stop it” when she means “Harder please” and saying “Stop it” when she means stop.
I know her and I know her limits. I would not be so forceful with a stranger.
Like I said, none of this is new to me.
We were playing, like we have many times before when she said “red.”
It wasn’t panicked, it wasn’t strained, it was a quiet “red.” I’m proud to say that I stopped instantly. It was almost reflexive.
I stopped so fast it was shocking for me. It was almost painful, like someone throwing a bucket of cold water on me.
After several moments of catching my breath and blinking in confusion, I started to figure out what had happened.
She was in the mood, I was in the mood, but the timing wasn’t right. The passion between us can be too much sometimes.
Being around her drives me crazy with powerful dominant energy and, according to her, when she’s around me she loses all control.
Indeed, I’ve never seen a woman get so wet so quickly.
She was correct to say “red” because I was going into that unstoppable dominant mode and she was sinking into her insatiable submissive mode.
I wasn’t hurting her, I wasn’t doing anything she didn’t want me to do, the timing simply wasn’t correct.
As much as we like to play, there’s an appropriate time and place for everything but that was not it.
She could have used her “Stop it for real” voice but saying “red” was faster and more effective.
It made me stop immediately and completely. It yanked me right out of the mood and back to reality.
As soon as I figured out what had happened, I knew that she was correct to use her safe word. I know how to push her buttons.
What she was trying to say was “Not now” but she was already too far gone to get the words out. She barely managed to say her safe word.
My point is, even if you dislike safe words as much as I do, even if you think you’re some kind of super-expert like I think I am, it’s still good to have a safety net.
All you young dominant wanna-be’s, learn to take it seriously.
Being dominant doesn’t mean you’re perfect. And all you submissive types, learn that using your safe word isn’t a failure, it’s helpful. I appreciate a submissive who is willing to help.
I love a little risk as much as the next guy but wow, getting a cold bucket of water thrown in my face sure is a good way to remind me that I’m not perfect.
It was like almost getting in a car accident but my passenger yelled “Watch out!” just in time.”
We were a few hours (time flies when you’re having fun…) into one of our most intense sessions so far. I was bound and bruised from the paddling that he had started with.
He had just finished bloodying my ass with a cane before he dragged me out into the yard.
He used me as his urinal and then grabbed the hose to clean me off. The shock of the cold water was so intense, but I felt so broken I couldn’t even scream or flinch.
It’s all a bit fuzzy now, but I just remember hearing him repeating “red” and him cutting the ropes off of me before carrying me inside to a hot shower.
When I regained a few my senses, he told me that at that moment he just felt so cruel and that he had lost himself and the sight of me emotionally broken jarred him out of it so fast, and it scared him.
We cuddled in bed for hours, with both of us reassuring the other how much we loved each other and how much we enjoy our sessions together.
I’ve never been this close with someone before, and I don’t think it would be possible without the BDSM aspect of our lives.
Once I found my #1 source for true sex stories, I never wanted to read fiction erotica anymore.
There’s something about it, when you know that the story is real, the fact that it actually happened.
The best point is how much you can learn from these real sex stories. It’s not just daydreaming, you actually can apply these stories in your relationships!
It’s fun to read them together with your partner.
It’s a fun, valuable read that sparks discussions..
And it also serves as a foreplay as usually my girl is horny after reading those for few hours… 🙂
Win, win..!
The Best Untapped Source For Real Sex Stories
In this guide I’ll focus on just one source, one community where I find all the best erotic stories…
But here I wanted to include 5 amazing true sex stories that you can read so you can grasp what kind of gold-mine Reddit is!
Real Sex Story #1 — “How We Survived a Threesome”
From this story you can actually learn how threesome looks like, what are the challenges and how to make it happen successfully yourself!
It doesn’t need to stay only as a fantasy!!
“My husband and I have a really good relationship.”
We know each other so well and have very similar needs and goals in life. Our sex life has been on fire lately.
One aspect in particular that had been receiving more attention was dirty talk regarding a threesome (FFM).
I don’t identify as straight, and although having strong emotional attachments, have never sexually been with a woman.
When I met my partner I could have gone my whole life never having explored that route and I would have been satisfied.
But once the dirty talking began, it certainly made my mind wander.
Perhaps it started with a wig, or a statement like “I wish I could fuck two of you at the same time” and it progressed from there.
Overtime it developed into explicit descriptions of what we wanted to see or do with one another + 1.
It began as something brought up during the act, and then became fuel that ignited it.
As it became more and more of a serious discussion we were more aware of the possible consequences.
Many relationships don’t survive the aftermath of it.
So we did our homework. We discussed who, where, when, and what.
We decided that to avoid any sort of relationship complications between us and the third, we would hire a professional (which is not illegal where we live).
This way we did not have to worry about it being a friend or trying to pick someone up online or in the world — which isn’t an aspect that appealed to either of us.
We both agreed that it was more important that I chose and that she checked off my boxes.
Petite, natural breasts, and if she had an alt look to her that was a bonus, although it was not a common finding.
On top of that, she obviously had to be comfortable with couples.
This was the most difficult part because many places didn’t advertise this openly.
After some disappointing phone calls, we came across one profile, and I basically made the real life equivalent of the heart eye emoji.
Brightly dyed hair, very visible tattoos and an ass that was an 11/10.
After some fumbling with setting it up, we had finally booked it, and the anticipation gutters set in.
In case the event did not go well, I did not want it to take place in our house.
I did not want to be reminded of it in the space that I live in daily.
We opted to rent a hotel room. Also a king sized bed allowed for a lot more leg room.
There were a few stipulations about when — we wanted it on a Saturday because of our work schedules.
I regularly get waxed (and don’t shave in between) so I wanted to make sure that it was recently done.
And obviously I didn’t want to be on my period.
What would take place was the longest most thought out discussion.
What were our boundaries, what could each person do to one another?
We opted to treat it as a two time event with multiple stages.
Basically in the first event (which is what happened) the contact between my husband and the third would be minimal, and the contact between myself and my husband would slowly increase through the stages.
We broke it down like this:
Stage 1: women and do whatever, man watches, can talk but nothing super explicit or controlling.
Stage 2: women can still do anything, husband and wife can go to third base, no deliberate contact between husband and third
Stage 3: women can still do anything, husband and wife can have sex, light touching between husband and third but no penetration.
And then if that all went well we would have a second event wherein he would play more or a role (FMF).
Also there were a couple general rules — no anal play, no cumming inside her and we had safe words.
We typed all this up and handed it to the third before we began to make sure we were all on the same page (literally and figuratively).
The threesome itself was very enjoyable.
Slightly awkward at first while we got into the rhythm of things.
I came twice, my husband once, and I think she came too — that’s the only downside to paying someone, you can’t really be too certain of how much they are actually enjoying it.
But at the same time it takes away the pressure to have all three people being satisfied at once.
Afterwards we talked, shared pictures of our pets and then she left.
We lay on the bed together for a bit. I was surprised at how I felt.
Nothing felt bad, nothing felt like a boundary had been crossed. It didn’t feel like our marriage had been contaminated or was at risk for falling apart.
It felt like we hung out with someone and then they left, we just happened to have all been naked and orgasming in between.
Part of our aftercare was having a bath. So once we were home (we didn’t stay at the hotel) we had an amazingly relaxing bath and then had sex again. And it felt just as good as it did before having a threesome.
And that’s how we survived a threesome.
A Quick Summary:
A happily married husband and wife hire an escort for a threesome, have lots of discussions and rules ahead of time.
Everything goes flawlessly, couple does not break up because of threesome.”
“We were in the middle of having sex so you could say technically I already had a ladyboner but…
Whenever I receive intense clitoral stimulation, my legs have the tendency to squeeze themselves together.
I don’t really control it;
I’ll be writhing and squirming in pleasure and my legs will just constrict around his waist or his hand if he’s fingering me or his head if he’s going down on me.
Today we were having sex in missionary (my favorite) and it was getting so good that my legs started latching around his hips.
Typical.
But then he suddenly leaned back and pried my legs apart and started fucking me roughly in that upright position, my legs spread out for him completely.
It was amazing but my legs naturally started drifting back together, except he forcefully jerked my thighs back into the spread position.
Normally I get off on hooking my legs around him (feels the most intimate and helps grind against my clit as well) but just being fucked on display for him, while he was holding my legs apart, was so primal and hot.
I think it was the combination of having his strong hands grasp my thighs and being in such a submissive position really got me off.
I love when my guy gets dominant and just stops caring about treating me delicately or being romantic.
I love it when he becomes an animal like that!
I felt like I was in a porno and now my legs are sore lmao but so worth it. Add this to the list of things that a guy can do to really drive me wild…
Later when I told him I loved that move, he was a bit surprised.
He said he had done it because he wanted to watch me being penetrated and get the full view rather than being closer up, but was glad I liked it too.
For some reason that made it even hotter, like it wasn’t something he did on purpose but rather instinctively and now knows that he should do it again.
Just wanted to share in case anyone else out there has a partner who likes it rough.”
I’ve been a long time lurker here and wanted to give back a little to all the young women like me who lurk this place to try to “get it right” for losing the stupid meaningless-but-meaningful V-card.
R/Sex is the place that made me more comfortable with my body and the idea of having sex on my own terms.
I’ve been debating for a long time about the circumstances under which I wanted to have sex for the first time, and decided that I wasn’t going to make it “a thing”.
Just isn’t what I want — if you want that, do it! But I met a guy, who I really like — no idea if this is a real romantic connection or what — and am so, so attracted to, and we ended up at his place watching TV.
One thing led to another and another, and we had sex.
(I didn’t mention the virginity thing — I really do believe it’s a personal choice to say something, and I didn’t feel like saying so.)
Things I learned through this experience that I didn’t expect, despite my r/sex lurking:
technical difficulties on both sides are more common than you’d expect,
positioning is more difficult,
and asking for consent actually doesn’t kill the mood.
He wasn’t hard enough the first time around, and I was way too tight, and so we fooled around in other ways and went to bed.
Woke up in the morning, tried again, switched positions about five times and FINALLY got it right.
For all you anxious people with vaginas out there — yeah, it hurt at first.
I do own dragon dildos, but it’s a bit different, and I totally told him to go easy on me.
Bled a little bit later on, but I’m not in any real pain and things turned pleasant after about a moment.
Your experience may be different.
For all of you people wondering if someone is “right” for your first time, ask yourself how you feel around them.
Do you like the way it feels when they touch you, anywhere?
Do you feel comfortable around them — not like you’re trying too hard, just comfortable?
I was amazed at how comfortable I was just being naked around this guy.
Don’t worry too much about performing.
Enjoy yourself.
I had a good time — I wasn’t as “good” in bed as I wanted to be, I didn’t end up going down on him even though that was part of my “plan” for my first time, and you know what?
That’s the nature of life.
Shit doesn’t go according to plan.
If this is the only time I get to sleep with him, that’s fine; if I get to sleep with him again, well, that’s another chance to do the things I want to do.
At the end of the day, things went really well.
Nothing ever goes according to plan.
I’m grateful to r/sex for giving me the information I needed to feel like I had some semblance of knowledge in this area, and for giving me the confidence to have sex!
This post doesn’t have a real point to it, but if any virgins out there are still nervous about things, ask away.
Maybe this story isn’t really erotic, but it definitely makes you think about your sexuality.
And it will for sure spark a conversation with your partner, as it did with mine!
“I know that r/sex tends to dislike those who fake orgasms — “you’re lying to your partner” “they deserve to know” etc.
And though I believe these arguments are fair, I feel as though all the emphasis is placed on how our partner feels.
No one seems to want to ask why people fake orgasms in the first place.
I feel like this is important to understand, and would kindly like to ask you to please read this to get some understanding of our side too.
I lost my virginity to my current boyfriend a little over a year ago.
I was a sexual person before that (masturbated every day or two, averaging two orgasms per session), so when I started having sex, I came every time.
One day, I decided I’d switch to oral birth control (we tried various condoms, none of them were comfortable to him, and he couldn’t come with them on.
Our country doesn’t exactly offer a wide variety of condoms either).
My sex drive took a nose dive.
We were long-distance for about 2 months when I started taking them, and by the time we started doing it again and the BC kicked in, I just enjoyed sex less, had less orgasms, and didn’t want to do it as often.
Boyfriend started initiating nearly 100% of the time, and I went from having an orgasm all the time to half of the time.
Now, my BF is a wonderful, understanding, kind person.
I love him to bits. I explained that this was because of my birth control, and he understood, but you can tell that it did hurt his ego, and subconsciously it still bothered him.
I don’t blame him.
Pornography has conditioned us to believe that everyone comes every time — women come several times too!
And if your partner doesn’t react that way, then you suck at sex, because hey, here’s a million videos that show you that sex is exactly like that!
Though most people realize that porn is an unrealistic presentation of sex, after being exposed to it for several years (as many people are), it’s hard for it to not influence ones perception of sex, at the very least subconsciously.
You know when you can rationally explain something to yourself, but emotionally and subconsciously it still makes you feel bad? It’s that.
Ask anyone who has a hard time coming (and that has had partners that care about their pleasure) how their partner(s) react to being told that they just can’t come.
I’ve read so many posts here along the lines of “My SO/FWB can’t come, and though they said they’re just like that, it makes me feel bad!”.
Often, our partners then either make it a mission to make us come, which just makes us frustrated, or the sex gets worse because they don’t feel as confident in themselves anymore.
So I sometimes fake it.
I fake it because after half an hour/45mins of sex my legs and vagina hurt but he insists on going because he wants to make me come even though I said I can’t.
I fake it because he needs extra reassurance that I enjoyed it when he finishes before me because he feels bad.
I fake it because he thinks that I’m no longer as attracted to him as I was before since I’m not initiating/enjoying sex as much as I was before.
I fake it because sex becomes much less enjoyable when I feel like I’m under pressure to have an orgasm, because there are negative consequences if I don’t — hurting my SO.
He, through his expression of displeasure that i cannot cum, is unintentionally punishing me — but that is punishment nonetheless.
It’s great to care abut your partner’s pleasure, but please, this is not how you do it, and far too many people take this approach.
For the love of God, if your partner says they cannot come, believe them.
Don’t be offended.
Don’t pressure them.
Don’t take it as a personal offence, because you are making sex worse for both yourself and your partner.
No one can truly enjoy sex when they feel like they’re under pressure.
Having pleasurable sex is something that requires the consent, patience, understanding, acceptance and communication/honesty of all parties.
You have the right to demand honesty from your partner as much as they have the right to demand understanding and acceptance from you.
It’s not good to be the SO that fakes orgasms, but it’s just as bad to be the SO that can’t accept that their partner cannot come, and try to force them/pressure them into doing so.
I’m very willing to hear peoples thoughts on this.
Once more: I am not supporting faking orgasms, I am simply trying to explain to people why we sometimes do it.
Thank you for reading, and I wish you a wonderful day :)”
So after some vetting, we arrange to meet up at a hotel.
One thing gave me pause and it was that this guy is really, really physically attractive.
Stereotypically so.
Literally tall, dark, handsome.
If I met him just out in the world and he told me he modeled, I’d have believed it.
So then some of the most emotionally gut wrenching sex happened. He just couldn’t get out of his head.
The best way I can describe it was like he was cramming for a test tomorrow and he already knew he was going to fail that class.
He wanted to do well so badly.
It wasn’t so much awkward as it was heartbreaking.
Eventually, after me trying to comfort him and coach him, he just got off of me, sat on the edge of the bed for a minute, and started to cry and tell me I could go.
In that moment, i felt this overwhelming sense of sorrow.
What he was feeling was so authentic and painful that I knew I had to be there for him.
I scooted up next to him and held him.
He asked me to please let him go and he said he felt worthless and like a loser.
I sat there and told him that I would leave if he really wanted me to, but that I would really like if he spoke to me about what he was feeling.
At this point I was crying so I think that made him feel more comfortable.
He told me that he was raised religious, didn’t say which, and that he was trying to wait until he was married for sex.
He said he was recently in a year long relationship where it eventually came up and his religious girlfriend broke up with him.
It got back to him that she did it because of his lack of experience.
He said he felt sex was ruined for him.
That it was tied to him feeling inadequate and like he wasn’t a real man with any value.
He said that everyone his age learned how to have sex 10 years ago and that he was waiting for a woman who wasn’t waiting for him.
His plan was to pay for sex.
He was going to keep going from sex worker to sex worker to build some experience but that he ended up just hating himself the entire time he was trying to have sex with me.
Before I could respond to him, he hurried and put his clothes on and left.
He gave me a very suicidal vibe and i must have called him more than 50 times. Sent like 10 texts.
I don’t know why but i just felt so scared for him. Still haven’t gotten a response. I don’t even know this guy and i feel so scared and sad for him.
Such a heartbreaking story.
I just want to hold on to him and tell him he’s not worthless.”
Forced orgasms are when you get your consenting partner to reach involuntary orgasm with the help of bondage, ropes and usually a Hitachi magic wand. In this guide you’ll learn what forced orgasm is, how to do it, the tools you need for effective orgasm bondage…
And finally I’ve collected collected people forced orgasm stories for an inspiring read..as a real-life erotica.
There are great tips hidden inside those stories though!
Here’s the best description of orgasm denial done right:
“Tell her she can’t do anything and you’ll have your way with her.
Touch everywhere, thighs, feet, butt, sides, boobs. Deny the pussy as long as you can.
Go slow, tease her. She’ll be soaking wet. Fuck her. Go slow.
Right when she’s on the brink of orgasm, stop, leave her, and get a divorce.”
“In the context of consensual BDSM, a forced orgasm is a form of orgasm control, whereby the active partner sexually stimulates the consenting partner until involuntary orgasm is achieved, with the consenting partner being unable to control the onset and intensity of orgasm.
The consenting partner would be put in physical restraints to increase the feeling of helplessness, and deprive him or her of the ability to control their orgasm.”
So your partner does give initial consent to give up control, and yes, there is a safe word you could use…
But the attraction and pleasure comes from giving up control. From the power dynamics — dominance & submission.
If you normally control exactly how you please yourself, where you touch yourself…
Here your partner decides, and if he’s a good partner he will tease you like crazy… He’ll get you close to orgasming and then stop.
While forced orgasms are very popular for women there is also forced ejaculation play for men alike.
Further down the line you can include even things like a chastity cage & belts to make the act even longer. For those who want some solo play, you can just get a blowjob machine.
I’ve actually invested over 50 hours of research to discover the best cock cages and making side-by-side comparison chart:
With cock cage you would prevent the male partner from ever touching himself unless the dominant gives the permission.
So in reality it’s a mix of different BDSM plays: orgasm control, then orgasm denial, ruining the orgasm… till finally making it happen.
Who thought that orgasm torture could be that pleasurable?
Why & What People Enjoy About Forced Orgasms?
Here’s how other people describe it:
“It’s the power.”
“I love it when my wife has had 6 or so orgasms and begs me to stop.
“Heck, doesn’t even have to be sexual to get a kick out of power and control.
But yeah controlling someone’s orgasms is awesome.
My bf and I are switches and I’ve always been an easy “orgasmer”.
Multiple, all that Jazz.
But…one of my best and most fulfilling orgasms was the one he gave me after he denied me for some time.
I had never been denied and had to hold back, so when he allowed me after building me up and making me come to the edge and have to hold it, once I came-omg.
This video is a great explanation of how to use all the tricks in the book to give the submissive the most intense forced orgasm ever:
orgasm control
ruined orgasm
orgasm denial
It’s all about the buildup — first is giving up control, then it’s to tease, but not give satisfaction… deny orgasm… then ruin it — which feels horrible…
For most people they prefer to use tried and true Hitachi Magic Wand for the job.
This model will last your for years and wireless function opens it up for lots of ideas.
For placement you can either use a forced orgasm belt or simply buy bondage tape (cheaper and better) and tie the vibrator like Hitachi magic wand to your partners leg and leave it there like this:
#3 — Vibrators With Remote Control
This is not that crazy BDSM type… but these are great for fun public play.
It works well for ladies.
At home you insert the egg shaped vibrator in the vagina (vibrating panties don’t work that well because vibrator doesn’t stay in one place).
Then your partner has a remote control or a phone app where he can control the intensity of vibrations of that toy.
A fun way to take advantage and see her squirm and try to hide the sensations.
There are many different options, but the highest quality is Lovense Lush Remote Control Vibrator. You can get Lush 1 for $69 or Lush 2 for $99.
It’s the best and proven… especially love the feature to control the vibrator using Internet connection where distance is no longer an issue.
(You can be at home and play with her while she’s at work).
Other People Orgasm Torture Stories for Your Inspiration
And here are tons of stories from real people with tips hidden inside… Enjoy:
“Tease & Denial a.k.a ‘Orgasm Torture’ according to my boyfriend.”
“Tease & denial is a kink that I’ve discovered recently.
It’s pretty much what it sounds like.
I get him hot and bothered but don’t give him any release.
We do that every night for a few days and then when he finally cums, his orgasm is supposed to be super intense from all the built-up sexual tension.
So he gets something out of it too (mind blowing orgasm).
I always tell my bf before I tease him to get his consent.
I don’t surprise him with it.
I’ll say something like “I’ll give you a blowjob tonight, but I’m not going to make you cum. Is that okay with you?”
He loves blowjobs so he can’t resist my offer even though he knows that he won’t get any satisfaction from it.
I give him super slow, teasing blowjobs (or handjobs or both) for around 15 minutes.
Then when his penis is very, very hard (just before he cums), I stop all the stimulation and say “fun’s over babe. goodnight” and I roll over and pretend to go to sleep.
I love his reactions at this point. It’s the best part.
He begs me to let him finish, says “please, please, please ‘I’ll do anything! ANYTHING! please just let me cum”.
It’s completely adorable.
I’ve gotten him to agree to a couple of very ridiculous things during this time, but since I’m a nice gf, I generally don’t take advantage of his desperation.
Some nights, he will literally beg for 20 minutes straight.
I do feel sorry for him so I have to fight the urge to give in!
So anyway, after a few nights of this, I eventually let him cum, but it’s unpredictable.
I might tease him for two nights or ten. It just depends on my mood.
Yesterday, after I made him cum, we were cuddling and he called my kink “torture” which I thought was funny.
I asked him if he likes it and he said he loves it and hates it at the same time.”
“So, I heard/read about cases, where a person died after about like 40 orgasms in a row — simply too exhausted.
Also, people with some heart issues might have some problems with really strong and long orgasms.
If you’re a healthy person tied to a sybian or another fucking machine, left there for a few minutes after orgasm, it probably won’t cause you much danger, apart from it being uncomfortable.
With such practices though, I would rather keep watching the tied person in order to intervene, if something bad happens.
If it’s your first time anal rimming, this guide will help you to do it pleasantly, safely and properly.
After 20 hours of research crowdsourcing hundreds of couple analingus tips, trying them myself, what you’re about to read condenses everything in actionable steps:
Is Anal Rimming Safe? What Are The Dangers of Doing Analingus?
As long as you do it with a safe partner where you both have been tested against STD’s — it quite safe indeed.
Just take a shower and enjoy…
Never had any problems…
Here’s what other people say:
“Little to no risk, truly. I have licked my wife’s ass many times, and of late, she does it for me at least once a week. I can’t recall either of us ever getting sick at all.” Source: alittlebirdy1
“I lick my wife ass every time i give her oraland i have never got sick or bad taste. She is always clean and ready for it so i am happy about that. my wife to enjoys it very much.”
“No risk, but seriously, have her shower first. Join her if you wish and get that thing nice and clean.” Source: psalyer
“My boyfriend eats my ass pretty regularly. He’s either got an iron stomach or it’s not that risky.” Source: MixedBritGirl
“I’m a nurse. You can get diseases from from this but i wouldn’t worry if you have good hygiene. I am not married but my boyfriend and i do it. I recommend always doing it after both of you get out of the shower. and i mean right after getting out of the shower. like 4 hours after the shower i probs wouldn’t do it b/c if your partner passes any gas it would make that area not clean anymore (its nothing you would see but it still is not as clean and I personally would recommend for wanting to rim).” Source: cheezypellican
Whatever position you choose, it’s good to think if possible about gravity.
The only real danger to infections is if butt bacteria gets into vagina.
So technically it’s smart to keep anus downhill from the vagina.
For example, in doggy style the liquids from ass will go down to vagina and gravity works against you.
For that reason, my favorite analingus position is her laying on her back (with pillow or wedge under).
Or pull her on the side of the bed.
If she lifts her legs, it will make her butt nicely exposed.
You can start licking pussy and then go to analingus (you cannot go back and forth though…).
It’s not recommended to go from butt to pussy.
But you can start with it, and then simply use fingers while licking her ass.
More analingus position ideas from other people :
“I usually position myself behind my wife so I can work my thumb directly on her clit while I feast on her ass. She has reached orgasm with this dual stimulation many many times. She’s loves it, and I love doing it.” Source: abovvvetheclouds
“I think it depends in part on her body shape. I have a little bit of belly, so I don’t like getting squished up, plus that makes it harder to breathe. A pillow under her hips might work, especially if you like her ass. Personally, I like being bent over a massage table. The table supports my body weight pretty much, and my ass is “presented” in a way that is just such a kinky turn on. My partner came, just looking at me bent over like that, a toy in my ass.” Source: sexycoat
“I’m a guy but I like 69ing when going to brown-town, what’s better than licking taint while getting sucked off?” Source: dlxnj
Facesitting
“Husband of analingus enjoying wife. It depends on how deep I want to go. Just sniffing and licking, she is on her belly with thighs spread, and I bury my face in between the cheeks. If she is up for deep tongue penetration, she gets doggy style in the edge of the bed, and I kneel on the floor next to her. Great penetration and easy on my back.” Source: ArtVandelayAV
Other People Analingus Experiences & Tips
Yep, here’s to more stories and common questions answered by real people… 🙂
Extra perspective than only mine, hope you’ll enjoy it:
Here’s a nice video where pornstars share their experiences and feelings about rim jobs:
Main takeaway: make sure your ass is clean and doesn’t smell!
“I’ve recently done an anilingus to my GF for the first time.”
“And now I’m totally addicted 😀
Seriously, guys.
It’s a new world that opened to me.
Even if you cannot (maybe?) make your partner cum this way, there is plenty of interesting things :
There are infinite ways to lick that booty. Where the cunnilingus is pretty strict on the method, here, you can freely express yourself, do circles, waves, double rotating dragon, and it’s really enjoyable
You can feel the pleasure of your partner trough the anal contractions (and muscles pressures). I personally find this more enjoyable than hips movements because it’s directly the zone you touch that react.
It offers a great mechanical management (yeah, technicals terms baby). You can squeeze, press, spread without fearing of touching inappropriate parts (however, try to avoid vagina/clitoris, infection risk) and of course, you can dive into that butt to redeem your loving moaning-money.
Of course, cunnilingus is still important / efficient, but please comrades, do not fear to eat that booty.
I should tell that I often stimulate vagina/clitoris in the same time. Ass-job could be sometime non-efficient when used alone 🙂
“Me and my long-time girlfriend tried analingus for the first time with unexpected results…”
“Me and my girlfriend, both 21, decided on a passionate love making session last night.
The usual things for foreplay to warm up but then before I knew it I had her with her face down in the pillow and butt in the air, two fingers inside of her and stimulating her clitoris.
I saw her anus staring back at me and just did a long lick up to it from where my fingers started and it drove her mad.
She started shaking like a car on bad gas and told me to keep doing it.
Moments later, I find myself completely tongue deep in her and she’s loving it!
Afterwards, she tells me she came at least 3 times in that position doing what I was doing and thoroughly enjoyed it!
She plans on adding it to our normal repertoire and may even reciprocate(though I’m personally a little self-conscious about it) .
Now I don’t see why is there so much stigma behind doing this?
I mean granted if somebody keeps themselves that clean enough that you would want to do it in the first place.
“He’d always say that we need to buy a harness and fool around, but then I’d finger him, he’d cum, and say “never mind, they’re so expensive, I like this, with just you”.
But my wrists and jaw gets sore before I’m done enjoying his ass, so I wanted to bring a toy in.
I settled on an Aneros massager that can be worn as a butt plug, I figured worse comes to worse, if he takes one look at it and says no, I can use it instead.
The first few times I used it with him, it was mid-rim job, once my wrist and jaw seized up, I’d ask if I can use the toy on him and he’d happily say “yeah, ok”.
But I always had to initiate, so I got the impression he was doing it mostly for my pleasure and to save my joints.
A few weeks later I’m taking a shower and as I get in I look down and the massager is just sitting on the floor of the shower.
I give it a proper wash since shower bases are kinda gross, and put it back in its cotton bag in the bedroom drawer.
A few days later, it’s sitting (clean) on the bathroom counter.
I can’t explain it, but just knowing he was using it when home alone was so hot.
I bought it for his pleasure and he was giving it a proper try.
My partner’s birthday was a few months ago and our birthday tradition has always been to give the birthday person an hour long sensual massage then oral until they cum.
So I get the oil and candles and he strips to his underpants and lies on his stomach.
Naturally I give his arse a squeeze before I start the massage proper, and he’s got the prostate massager in, acting all nonchalant like he doesn’t have a sexy secret in his ass…
…the massage part of the evening didn’t last long.”
“Only really did rim job once with an ex but was always really turned on if she started licking my balls and perineum, the closer she got the more I hoped she’d go for it. “
“When we finally tried it that was amazing but after that she told me to turn over onto all fours and licked me from behind while jerking me backwards (kind of like milking a cow).
I can not express how amazing this felt (although your first paragraph came close).
I seriously still fantasize about it years later.
The same girl would also sometimes push on my perineum when jerking me off or if she was riding reverse cowgirl.
Definitely an interesting sensation and I think you might be able to stimulate the prostate that way as well if you push quite hard.
I don’t really think there’s an incorrect way to do it though, just match it to the mood (if you’re being having rough sex then be a little rougher, if you’re teasing him then be soft and gentle).
Personally I love it when a girl is being really gentle and teasing but then every once in a while squeezes my ass or bites my thigh quite roughly, like she’s having trouble holding herself back.
Finally, if you are going to (or want to) try penetrating him, whether with a tongue, finger etc.,
It’s probably a good idea to just straight up talk to him about it (if you haven’t already, not sure if that’s what you meant by “mentioning it”).
Maybe he feels very differently about penetration than he does about stimulation, but either way it’s best to have talked about it ahead of time and you can both express what you’re hoping to get out of it, what you definitely don’t want, what you’re curious to try etc.
Having that conversation beforehand can make it a lot easier and more relaxing in the heat of the moment.”
“Thing is, he initiated it the first time and we went from there.
That said, you do still have to get him going before slowly inching your way down that way and reading his body language/moans for signs of hesitation from him.
You have to go down on him like you’re trying to suck the soul from his body.
Real wet and sloppy.
As he starts bucking and moaning, slightly change the rhythm by going a bit further south each time you bob.
Make it subtle and not abrupt.
As you’re making your way south to include his balls in this soul sucking blow job, you can take your hands slowly (nothing can be abrupt!) and let them make their way under his thighs.
Your hands are oh so casually gently caressing under his thighs while you lick and drool on his balls.
Once your hands are there and he’s moaning in pleasure, very gently apply some pressure.
If he wants his ass licked, girl he will bring his knees to his chest.
You get him going and you can most likely pick up on his body language of whether or not its ok that day.
Its not always a good moment to have your booty hole licked, so keep that in mind just in case he does hesitate or clench up during your BJ.
Maybe it just wasnt a good moment for him and maybe try again another time.
One time (in the height of passion BJ) I just whispered “can I get in there?” as I squeezed his ass.
He quickly gave me an “uh huh” and positioned himself appropriately.
Its fun!!! Good luck!”
“My girl gets the most intense orgasms when I stick to anal rimming without touching her pussy at all.”
“Always even when you are not licking an asshole… Hygiene.
Both for you and your partner. I’ve found it to be one of those things you just… do.
In the spur of the moment with a SO… it’s sexy and dirty while also intimate, which I am into.
A freshly washed asshole is advised but feel her out.
Chances are that she wont let you do it if she is a bit backed up and not feeling sexy there… so go for it.
I usually massage my SO’s asshole while doing her doggy to see how she feels and gently slide my thumb in.
If she reaches her hand back when I am massaging the rim… that usually means “Stop, stop… I had tacos.” (or if this is uncharted territory it means “No. I’m not ready for that.”)
If there is nothing on my thumb we are good to go.
This all being done in a sexy manner… not like I’m testing for PH levels with my thumb for um science.”
Since there is a strong bias towards rimming being strictly something that gays do, let’s debunk this myth first!
Truth is, guys have a lot more reasons to enjoy anything butt sex related than girls and if they are just open-minded enough they will unleash so much pleasure in there…!
“Highly underrated sex act, I think the fear of liking anal stimulation=you’re the big gay makes a lot of guys miss out on an extremely pleasurable experience.”
“As a male I can tell you rimming & prostate milking is the single most amazing physical experience you can possibly ever have. “
“After you fight of the odd sensations of thinking you are going to pee all over the place, and the slight discomfort of your prostate feeling so full, a warmth begins to build up, almost an itch you cant scratch.
It builds and builds and builds until all of a sudden Electrical impulses radiate all over your whole body and you shake followed by radiating warmth, and then total collapse.
Its all you imagine a woman’s G-sport orgasm might be like and possibly more due to the emotional involvement required to achieve this feat.
And the best part, because it was not a standard orgasm you still have a full orgasm left to go, but your body may be so tired you just go to sleep instead.”
Double penetration can be tons of fun if you do it right. It’s not like it looks in porn, but with proper preparation and expectations, it can be a mind-blowing experience.
After over 20 hours of research you’ll find the best DP sex enthusiast stories, explanations of how it feels like, and how you can do it successfully yourself.
Now…
Is double penetration as good as it looks in the movies?
Or is it only reserved for naughtiest couples with high pain tolerance?
Here’s the best quick explanation of how double penetration feels like:
“If you want the truth, the equivalent would be what it feels like for a guy getting head while also taking the best shit of your life.
My body locked up during it cause it was so much good at once.”
To me it felt like just something different, exciting, kinky…
And because of that it was super arousing and sexy — it was very hard not to orgasm quickly because of all excitement.
Both for me and my partner — we loved it since we took our time.
I guess that’s the biggest downside to DP and anything anal related — if you want it to be pleasurable, it’s gonna take time to open butt for receiving.
And if you need to get the third partner, there are the logistics of it.
But as somebody smart has said: where there is will, there is a way.
Here’s other people descriptions of sensations of DP:
“It’s a very intense feeling of fullness, edging on pain. Depends on partners, and your level of relaxation.”
“I’ve done it a few times with different partners, and would recommend it to anyone curious about it, given the right partners.
That said, it was fun, pleasurable, but not really great.
It is a bit awkward to pull off, and the movement with the person on bottom is usually somewhat restricted.
I prefer using a vibe during sex, which is harder to do during DP.
As far as what it feels like, it’s basically like having anal and vaginal sex at the same time.
There are a lot of nerve endings in both areas and can be very pleasurable, but if the guy in the back is too large for you (or you aren’t properly prepared to take him) it can hurt.
Otherwise it feels great and has the added mental turn on of being taken by two guys (as long as their attitude is in synch with mine).
It’s also important that the male partners are comfortable having sex near each other.
They can’t be put off by having their legs rub up against another dude’s hairy legs.
They have to be prepared to have another man’s face 2 or 3 feet away from their own, watching him make fuck faces, listening to him moan and groan.
Also, they have to be comfortable feeling another man’s cock rubbing against their own through the thin layer of skin that separates the anus and the vagina.
If you want to know what it feels like, have your partner use her finger or a small dildo on your ass while giving you a hand job or a blow job.
Anal stimulation in conjunction with genital stimulation is quite pleasurable, as long as you use plenty of lube and don’t take in more than you can handle.”
Source: Anonymous
“I love double penetration. “
“It often happens when I am on top of one man and other men enter me from behind.
I have also been double penetrated when on my side and one man is in front of me and another is behind me.
I have had two men (one vaginally, the other anally) and I have had two men (in vagina) at the same time.
This is the fullest you can feel.
And it feels amazing.
All the men who have ever double penetrated me have wanted to do it again.
They say it feels incredible to them, too.
If it feels as good for them as it does for me, I can see why.”
“Last April I (20 Female) and my SO (22 Male) brought our friend (19 Male) home with us from a party.”
“We’d discussed it before and had been flirting for months.
When we got home, we jumped straight in bed. I started giving them both handjobs and alternating blowjobs.
After a lot of touching and moaning, I focused my mouth on our friend and my SO started warming up my ass.
He slid into me and I moaned with my mouth full with our friend’s cock.
I then climbed on top of our friend and rode him while my SO tried to stay in my ass, but we couldn’t make that position work.
So, I laid down on top of my SO with his cock in my ass and our friend went to town fucking me.
It was by far the most intense perma-gasm I have ever experienced.
Then, as previously discussed, they both pulled out and came on my face.
It was absolutely glorious.
I can’t wait to have two cocks pounding away inside of me again.
Double penetration had been a fantasy of mine since I was about 15 watching porn, but let me tell you, that night was so far beyond how good it looks in porn…I don’t even have words…”
“I’m female and have done double penetration once.”
“I found it mostly incredibly overwhelming, to the point where the physical pleasure and arousal maybe took a backseat.
The sensory input was insane, much more than when a partner fucked me with his dick and a strapon at the same time — two people, two bodies, trying to get the rhythms right, trying not to push anybody back out.
“Ageplay or age play is a form of roleplaying in which individual acts or treats another as if they were a different age.”
Here’s how this guide is organized:
What Is The Meaning and Definition of DD/LG?
What is The Little Space?
What DDLG is NOT?
DDLG rules, punishments and rewards
What are the best shops to buy DDLG outfits, accessories and onesies?
DDLG Sex: How Do You Behave In The Bedroom?
DDLG: What Is The Meaning and Definition?
Let’s get to it:
DD/LG is an acronym for Daddy Dom / Little Girl.
It’s basically one of the kinks, that can be sexual (but doesn’t need to be).
There are usually two people involved:
Daddy Dom — usually male, who takes a dominant role
Little Girl (DDLG little) — usually female, who takes a submissive role.
Some people also call it CG/L — CareGiver/Little 🙂
In BDSM this idea is pushed even further where Daddy Dom becomes the caregiver, and little girl becomes childlike.
But it’s not purely about dominance and submission.
Daddy Dom’s role is that of a lover, not a punisher.
He loves her little unconditionally and wants to take a really good care of her.
He loves her silly, cute behaviors and wants to cherish her little one.
But there are times when he needs to punish her even if his heart is breaking while he does it.
Little Girl’s role is complicated.
She is a serious businesswoman who also sleeps with her teddy bear. She is both sexy and cute as she likes to wear naughty lingerie, make ponytails and enjoys tea parties with her stuffies.
Her mood changes quickly, she loves to cuddle, be indecisive and moody. But she knows her Daddy loves her and will always good care of it.
Because of that..sometimes she abuses this love to get something out for herself…
So as you understand DDLG is a sexy roleplay where couple enters into Age Play and so-called “Little Space” which often involves child-like things like:
stuffed animals
bed-time stories
and..best of all — girls usually kinks like — wearing pink clothing, onesies, pony-tails, or even baby pacifiers
Believe me, it’s tons of fun and a super sexy way to spice up your relationship 😉 (might even be able to use a penis sleeve to add some intensity)
…plus you can change roles sometimes if you desire so 😉
What Is The Little Space?
Little space is where you enter the headspace of careless life away from responsibility full adult world.
In our days, women get more and more responsibilities and men natural dominant role is lessened, so this kink really helps to restore the balance a bit in the relationships.
At work, a woman can be dominant leader, but when she comes home she can play silly, little girl.
In a cute way, she gets the Daddy Dom, the caregiver to take care of her.
How to get into little space?
To help your little girl to get into the space, you could:
play a dress-up
put her favorite little space movie (Willie Wonka anyone?)
buy her a teddy bear & make a tea party with the stuffies
feed her during the meal-time because she probably is messy by herself
sit her on your lap while you play with her hair and rub her back,
Note: If you want even more complete guide including DDLG scene examples, outfits, rules, protocols explained in detail, check out this DDLG definite guide.
What DLDG is NOT?
Since there is not much clear information on DLDG kink, some people mistakenly believe it’s encouraging pedophilia, abuse or whatever other horrifying things that comes to mind.
DLDG is nothing like that!
IT’S NOT AN ACTUAL RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN A FATHER AND DAUGHTER — IT IS A FUN ROLEPLAY BETWEEN TWO CONSENTING ADULTS!
It’s a harmless kink, a fantasy that adults like to play between themselves to add spice to their love life, relationships and play out the light BDSM, dominant/submissive roleplay.
You can take it as far as you want:
It could be just a fun way for a man to take care of her women, so she feels like a little girl, who gets her all wishes fulfilled away from the care of real life.
It could be foreplay before going sexual and it can stop with that
It could be full-blown Father/Daughter sex fantasy played out as fathers are often an authority figure in a girl’s life and sometimes is a hidden taboo kink in their minds. It all starts with her calling you “Daddy”…
DDLG Rules, Punishments & Rewards
Now when you know what DDLG is and is not, it’s time to set some ground rules.
Little girl needs some rules, punishments, and rewards — where is the fun in it otherwise?
Before you start with the roleplay, it’s advisable to sit down and write things down and agreed by both parties.
Just in case you should also have a safe word to avoid unnecessary misunderstanding.
Here are some example DDLG rules for littles:
The little girl will always trust and respect the Daddy Dom (caregiver)
Always refer to him as a Daddy (or — master, papa, lord, sir)
Always refer to her as Little Girl(or — baby girl, angel, darling, princess, bunny)
Always be well mannered like “Please” and “Thank You”
No talking to strangers
Clean your room every day
Tell Daddy what’s wrong when you’re upset
Always tell your Daddy when you want to go somewhere
Always keep your hair brushed
No swearing, no backtalking to your Daddy
When your Daddy tells it’s bedtime, you must obey (even if it involves a little whining…)
Here are some example DDLG punishments for littles:
early bedtime
no electronics for an hour
no teddy bear for a bedtime
no snacks/chocolate
no cuddles with your Daddy
spanking when you have been a really bad girl
So what are the DDLG rewards for good behavior?
Daddy reads you a bed-time story
No chores for a day
Have your favorite snack for breakfast
Daddy brings you out for a shopping spree (with a budget)
A few sexual rule ideas:
No orgasming without permission
No touching of your Daddy’s or your princess sexy parts without Daddy’s permission first
Obey your Daddy’s commands during sex (remember the safe word if things escalate too far)
Always tell if you’re uncomfortable with something sexual he asks from you (even if you actually find it super sexy, little complaining never hurt anybody ;))
I know it’s a lot to think about.
But I made a quick role-map you can refer back to:
And remember…
Daddy isn’t always right, but Daddy’s word is always final unless the Little Angel can convince otherwise…
Oh…Watch this video to see how DDLG can look like…coming from a pro DDLG player:
What are the best shops to buy DDLG outfits, accessories from?
Obviously, since guys are playing grownups they can usually just stick to their suits, but for ladies…
…there is a lot of room to explore!
Below is a general look of suggestions for the best places to explore, but if you want to just browse through the best-selling, most popular choices on all the DDLG gear you could ever want — check here.
#3 — First of all, there’s always Amazon!
The good keywords to use are:
“ABDL outfits for women”,
“adult baby onesie”
“adult baby onesies for women”
“abdl skirt”
And as for the color — you can never go wrong with PINK 🙂
Note: Here’s a thorough selection of the most popular DDLG outfits, that I compiled after surveying DDLG fans 🙂
The next place to look for super cool accessories is:
They’ve got it all starting from clothing, accessories to even house & home items, toys…even pet outfits (bunny, anyone? 🙂
DDLG Sex: How Do You Behave In The Bedroom?
It’s up to you how far you bring this 🙂
The sky is the limit!
But know that Daddy Dom is a lifestyle, not a role play! 🙂
If you are naturally dominant, confident in real life it will naturally move to your sexual life as well.
The only warning though would be to talk about these things up front so you know how far you can go.
Also, remember that being a dominant in bed DOESN’T just mean telling her what to do. In truth, it’s also about paying attention to her and fulfilling her desires WITHOUT asking.
With that out of the way:
Daddy Dom doesn’t need to ask her questions. He knows what she wants by listening to her.
Daddy Dom knows exactly what and how he wants especially inside the bedroom. He is in charge of the situation, the Little one only needs to surrender and enjoy the ride.
Daddy Dom is playful, seductive and he knows when to ramp things up and when to step back
And a few dom phrases to get you started:
Did I say you could stop?
Excuse me?
Now.
That wasn’t a suggestion
Did you just say no?
Wanna say that again?
Don’t make a sound
In my opinion, DDLG gets the most exciting if you play it from the beginning to the end.
The Little Space and roleplay can be great foreplay and a way to spice up your love life!
Just remember to communicate and have fun!
Little Bonus: A Special Handy Daddy Dom / Little Girl Characteristics Map!
Since you read till the end I wanted to reward you… 🙂
It’s a handy map that you can look at to help you remind yourself of good Daddy Dom & Little Girl characteristics.
Download it as a image or here’s a free PDF (right click: Save as)
This guide is only a start, but remember this:
Polarity is the secret to lasting passionate relationships.
Both D/S play and DDLG naturally enhance these qualities.
P.S. If you enjoyed this guide, please pass it along to someone else who would benefit from it. I would appreciate it a lot. Also I have an awesome guide on the best pocket pussy you can check out as well.
Fingering is an incredible way to add variety to your love life. Learning how to finger a girl the right way is a skill that doesn’t come like that – it must be practiced.
While you’ll learn the best manual techniques, you’ll quickly notice that your fingers go limp fast, which is the reason why I recommend to get a rabbit vibrator that will hit the right spot effortlessly. The great thing with toy is that you are still driving the thing, but the work gets a lot easier. She’s squirming in your hands and you’re enjoying the process vs working hard.
Oh, you’re in for the treat.
When you’re done with this guide, you’ll know exactly how to finger a girl to get her pussy dripping wet — no fucking machines necessary.
And since every woman is different I actually compiled the best fingering techniques between many people.
So you can just cherry-pick (or heck, try them all) between these.
What you might have not known is that actually with some work you could make her squirt during fingering 😉
But first things first — fingering is actually the easiest thing to learn to give her orgasms.
It’s also great for the foreplay… all in all —
I LOVE FINGERING.
And you should too!
Here’s what we’re gonna cover:
The Best Fingering Techniques From Experienced Men and Women
Do guys actually enjoy fingering their girl?
Guys: Do you get hard while fingering or eating out a girl?
So first part will be for both men and women 😉
2nd and 3rd will explain how guys feel about fingering… 😉
Let’s jump in:
#1 — The Best Fingering Techniques From Fingering Experts (and some go-to toys)
There are manual ways of fingering and a lot easier way with sex toys.
Toys help you become fingering master overnight and let you work way less while giving her a lot more pleasure.
It’s good to know the manual way, but you’ll quickly notice how numb your fingers get…and how hard the work gets.
Now my go to fingering toy is a rabbit vibrator…
It gets more results with less work.
Disclosure: Some of the links below are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase. I review each product thoroughly and recommend only the very best.
Vital:Don’t buy sexual wellness products on Amazon. You won’t get a warranty and chances are high you’ll get counterfeit product that is lower quality and from possibly toxic materials. Instead buy from original creators or from trusted sources we’ve identified.
Also, sometimes you might want to not use vibrations at all. Or just use shaft vibrations or just clitoral vibrations — there are two separate buttons that allow to control each motor separately.
When using it, make sure you don’t just pull the toy in and out. Let her instruct you on the spot and then simply keep pressing up and down or a little bit back and forth.
The toy is made from quality silicone material and may not be the most silent… but if all goes well, she will be screaming and moaning louder than the toy anyway.
You might even get to squirting orgasms with this one.
While the most squirting success comes from either the Greedy Girl or nJoy Pure Wand, sometimes the budget doesn’t allow for anything more than 30 bucks.
This is an affordable body-safe silicone toy that has curved shape with vibrations, which gives it certain advantages.
If vibrations is her thing, this might be even better than PureWand.
However the downside of this toy is that it isn’t as heavy as the Wand, so it might not be strong enough to hit that G-spot hard enough.
Nevertheless the curve will hit the spot and toy is slim enough to let you test the waters.
Check out this video to see the toy in action. It’s not the exact model, but a replica of it (that has been discontinued), but it will give a clear idea of how this G-spot toy works:
People keep talking about the sorcery and magic of Njoy Pure Wand.
It looks so simple, yet somehow it keeps delivering squirting orgasms even to the non-believers!
This metal thing and prostate toy has been guilty of countless women squirting orgasms (and for men — prostate orgasms).
Oh…and if you want to give her a luxury experience this new toy Lelo Soraya Wave with its Wave motion both vibrates and nicely, yet subtly targets the G-spot. Check our review of the exact experience.
I’ll let you ponder about the toys, but now let’s move to manual techniques:
Wanna give your woman the best fingering ever?
“Last night my boyfriend did this to me for the first time ever… and holy fuck.
Place 2 fingers inside of her on on her g-spot.
Then put pressure on it from the outside, slightly above her mound. Then rub her g-spot.
Holy hell. I had tears rolling down my face, I came instantly every time he started and kept coming until he stopped.
He would give me a break, then do it again.
After the 3rd one, when I was laying there panting and wiping the tears off of my face, he says to me with a sly grin, “Let me know when you want another.”
This is also great for if she wants to go for a round and you’re too tired.”
The Fingering Tips Coming From An Experienced Girl…
“So there seems to be a common misconception about fingering and finger fucking with guys and yes, some women as well.
The following is my experience only, and as always your mileage may vary.
We’re all different so I can only report on what I see/ like or what those I talk to do.
Also, this post is largely aimed at helping out 20-something guys who are wanting to learn more about how to be a pleaser for their partner.
First, clean, neatly trimmed nails only please.
Do not believe the fake lesbian porn you see with gigantic fake nails, no one actually wants to get all cut up.
Guys!
The goal is NOT to stuff your fingers in there as quickly as you can.
Believe me, none of those parts are going anywhere and they’ll still be around in 10 minutes.
I’ve lost count of the number of times a guy has gone down my pants with his hand, right past the clit, to stuff fingers inside me.
I’m usually not wet enough for that yet.
Many women (most in my experience) want to be “teased up” to that.
We don’t need to be stuffed like a Christmas turkey right away.
Take your time and make us want it…
When we feel wet on the outside- it’s a better bet that we are ready for inside play.
As far as inside play, I’ll let you in on another secret.
I do not now, nor will I ever think your fingers are a substitution for your dick.
They are there for different functions.
Although I enjoy a good finger fuck from time to time, I’d prefer an actual penis for fucking personally.
So- just mashing those fingers back and forth inside me is very “meh”.
I WILL tell you that fingers move around for a reason… while she is laying on her back if you lightly rub the “roof” of her vag, you’ll be playing with and around her G-Spot which is INFINITELY more awesome than a finger fuck, I promise.
Hard and fast aren’t always necessary…
I have my best, hugest orgasms when my BF is rubbing my G- Spot as if he were scratching a cat under its chin.”
Another is that finger her vagina with middle, index, or both AND have your thumb stimulate her clit.
A variation on that technique is to start with just the vaginal stimulation and then add the thumb-focus on the clitoris-it Ramps up the intensity for her.
While your hand is busy you can use your mouth on her breast and nipples.
But it’s not just about mashing your fingers against her woman parts at full force.
“Tell a story”-follow a bell curve of action.
Ramp up slowly, build to her climax, then-important-don’t just drop her off a cliff-work her back down.
You can summit and mix metaphors again but let her savor that orgasm.
Another technique that drives her wild is putting the middle and ring finger two phalanges deep, flicking the hand open (towards her perineum), and closing the hand into her G-spot.
It’s like clapping with one hand. Works wonders.
From the semi-close position, you can also lock your hand in place on the G-spot and lightly palm her clit and…how can I describe this… “Scrub” her vagina?
My hand is like the “mano cornuto” minus the thumb.
You can also do a combo of both.
Sometimes I even just stop fingering when it gets hot for her and hold her face in my hands and kiss her just to tease her more.
When i do this she’s just about grabbing my cock and trying to shove it in her.
At that point, you can let her guide where the session goes OR turn the tables.
Take control back and go down on her. Just use your imagination.
One thing I really miss that we don’t get to do anymore, because of kids, is make out on the couch with clothes on.
I think that’s pretty hot.
Messing around with clothes on is a mega turn-on.”
“ Fingering/pussy eating technique that blew my MIND!!!!!!”
“Fellow female here.
Now, as many of us have realized, it is not always easy to get a female to orgasm.
For those of you who achieve it with ease, I’m kind of jealous.
I can make myself come with a weird technique that involves squeezing my thighs together in such a way that causes clitoral stimulation, but I’ve never really been able to orgasm through penile penetration.
With oral, I’ve gotten close, but could never really let go.
Well, I’m not sure if this is a combo of the passion I feel with the man that did this to me mixed with his skill, but he tried something on me that I’ve never experienced before and it drove me crraaaaazy!
Like I could feel the orgasm building up and it was simply tantalizing.
In the end I couldn’t release myself because I think it’s a personal thing but i still enjoyed it immensely and I just wanted to share what he did.
I think it also has something to do with how soft and wet his tongue is, but he lightly stroked my clit with his tongue while softly probing the very entrance of my vagina with the tip of his finger.
IT DROVE ME CRAZY!
He was not completely finger fucking me, just sort of teasing the very sensitive entrance with his finger while gently taking care of my clit with his tongue.
Remember the teasing before the attack is key.
Brush your lips against her clit, let her feel your breath.
“No offense intended but if you come home from dinner and wanna get to fingering action right away, at least use a sanitiser
And also, if there’s black dirt underneath those nails, it’s a turnoff
I am sure not all guys and girls are the same but the genitalia are kind of sensitive since there mucous membranes and having clean nails is a great start to fingering a girl.
“I always clipped my finger nails in beside her while we’re talking in front of the TV or while she’s writing on her work desk, to tease for what about to happened in the next few minutes.
The sound of the clipper always makes her blush and asked me in a semi squeeky voice, “What are you doiiiing?”
“What do you think am I doing? I am trimming my finger nails.” I answered always in a serious flat tone.
After I’m done, I always go to wash my hands with warm water.
While I’m doing that, she’s almost always responded with her cute giggly voice, “NOOOOO baby, I’m workiiiing.”
“Use Your Mouth… to Talk to Her About What She Enjoys”
“People are different.
Some girls like hard g-spot stimulation.
Some like the feeling of being stretched.
Some just like to have something in there to squeeze against while you play with their clitoris.
I don’t know your girlfriend.
I can’t tell you what she likes. She can, so ask her.
More importantly, encourage her to give you feedback while you are touching her — X is good, Y not so much, avoid doing Z.
It doesn’t need to be verbal, non-verbal is probably sexier, but whatever you guys are comfortable with.
One tip which is pretty much universal, though: Cut your fingernails, and then file/sand/buff them until there are no sharp edges at all, especially around the corners of the nail.
Everyone’s different, but nobody likes vaginal lacerations.
Personally I’m a guy and I don’t have much in the way of nail care equipment, so I use 400 grit sandpaper to smooth them out 😉
If you’re not sure whether you’ve got them smooth enough, stick your finger in your mouth and use your tongue to try and find sharp spots.”
“Best fingering technique is the one that works for her, so try a bunch of different movements and gauge/ask about it. “
“One single technique may work for one girl and do nothing for others.
Important Note: Cut nails short about 2 days prior.
Long nails will scratch, freshly cut nails will scratch.
If short notice, file down fresh nails to be less edgy.
Some suggestions to try:
Classic G spot: Insert 1–2 fingers with pads pointing toward her belly, and flex slightly so it’s like a claw toward her belly button. Pump hand in/out, so that fingertips are rubbing the belly-side wall of vagina. (Bonus: use other hand or mouth to involve tits, vulva, clit, etc.
Insert fingers slightly in, with palm of hand resting in clit. Use movements that pump fingers in/out while also keeping pressure and rubbing clit.
Ask her how she masturbates. Replicate movements. Repeat until orgasm.
Be creative, try out stuff and see how she likes it.”
“I’m a huge fan of manual stimulation in any way. “
“I have a big handjob kink to the point where I would take a lubed handjob over a blowjob 9/10 times.
Similarly, I love slowly fingering my gf and getting her really worked up.
It’s great to be able to dirty talk too while having a ton of control over how I touch her and reacting to her reactions.
One thing we like to do is lay in bed, where I’m on my back and she’s on my stomach, also facing up.
I can whisper filthy things into her ear, I can easily wrap one hand around her throat or play with her nipples, and play with her clit with my other hand.
And it’s a great angle, basically the same as if she were playing with herself.
Plus she can feel my erection pushing into her ass, and that makes her squirmy, which just turns me on even more…
Highly recommended it to anyone who likes hand stuff.”
“I used to lay in bed with my ex girlfriend and she would just melt.
She would press herself into me like she just couldn’t get close enough to me and her breath would start to hitch and her hips would start to buck in the most unbelievable way.
It was probably the most fun sexual thing we did imo.”
“It goes through phases of being hard and not hard. “
“I just love seeing my girlfriend squirm, or smelling her and feeling her warmth and soft body.”
“I do get hard, but it’s not always rock solid. “
“Sometimes it can be semi erect while I eat her out, but it usually gets harder as she’s reaching her climax.
I once actually came myself, just by looking at her as she orgasmed.”
“I’m not a guy but my husband always gets really, really hard from making me come. “
“To the point that I have had to learn over our relationship how to stay quiet for my first several orgasms because otherwise it will just be too much.
He won’t be able to have piv sex with me practically at all because he will be so ready to come that just starting to enter me will be too much.
That being said, it’s his thing.
All of it is from fingering me, he isn’t a huge fan of oral at all.
Point being, everyone has their things they enjoy, and there’s no shame in not staying hard during any specific act. S
hit, sometimes I give him head and feel practically nothing.
Depending on my mood.
I don’t question it because why should I?
We are happy fucking each other in whatever way makes us satisfied.”
Edging is a great way to reach crazy intense orgasms (for both men and women). But for men edging originally was invented to prevent premature ejaculation.
Either way, after you’re done you’ll have more control over your orgasms. Use it as you like. At the end of the article I share 10 honest reader stories of their edging experiences — good and bad.
Here’s what we’ll cover:
What is Edging?
Is Edging Bad For Your Health?
What are The Benefits of Edging?
Preparation: How To Practice Edging By Yourself
How To Edge Yourself During Sex & Delay Ejaculation? : 5 Best Edging Techniques
Orgasm Control: How To Edge Your Woman For Intense Orgasms?
Reader’s Experiences: Edging Stories From Men & Women
Let’s jump in:
What is Edging?
Edging is a sexual practice that was originally invented for men to prevent premature ejaculation (btw you can use a penis sleeve to numb the sensations too, and get bigger penis overnight…think super thick condom).
But nowadays…
It’s been often used to reach more intense orgasms for both men and women.
For example, a power play. In BDSM it’s called orgasm control.
One partner is tied to the bed, helpless. The other partner does as he pleases and tease her to get close to orgasm, but then denying.
It drives rope bunny crazy… but is also plenty of fun.
It’s like charging a battery…
You delay the pleasure, tease yourself or your partner…
…and the final time you cross the finish line with such a power that your orgasm is much longer and intense than you even thought possible.
In this article, I’ll focus mostly on men’s perspective and how they can use edging to last longer.
You’ll simply learn to control yourself better and with this power you can do whatever you like.
Is Edging Bad For Your Health?
It really depends…
Because you can overdo it. If you go too close to the edge, for too long, and then use squeeze technique to prevent ejaculation (for men)… you can get yourself blue balls.
I got into troubles like hurting belly when I was edging myself for an hour, going intensely close and then not ejaculation at all.
There is also a way to pull your balls down, squeeze the “million dollar spot” between your butthole and balls to stop ejaculation.
But all of these are forceful ways.
If you don’t venture close to the edge, you’ll have no side effects.
From scientific studies, there been some rumours of increased prostate cancer if you ejaculate very rarely (like less than every 30 days), but again it’s not very reliable.
Then taoists have practiced semen retention and not ejaculating at all for extended periods of time. And they have done it for more than 5,000 years, they taught Chinese emperors this stuff and they were confident saving semen actually increased their lives…
And many of them lived over 100 years, so who’s right?
Anyway, if you don’t go crazy, you’ll have no side-effects.
But it’s the same as having too long sex, or too rough sex.
Your penis gets tired, pussy gets irritated — is it good for your health?
I guess not. But it all heals and the next day you’re all fine and dandy.
My advice is:
Learn how to edge yourself and use it to add more fun during sex and last longer!
What are The Benefits of Edging?
To me as a man, it really helped increase my sexual confidence.
After I learned how to control myself better, never again I am worried that I will ejaculate too early.
I am in perfect control of my arousal, I know my limits and I can work within those limits.
So it’s being in control vs letting orgasm happen to you.
Which one is better? I’ll let you decide.
If you care about pleasure, then you’ll be happy to learn that after you edge yourself for 4–5 times getting close to the “point of no return”, stepping back… and getting close again…
The final time when you cum, you’ll cum powerfully like a pornstar would in the movies! (you can also use some other ninja tricks to increase cum volume)
If your lady likes you to cum on her, then you can really impress her with your manly huge load of cum.
Preparation: How To Practice Edging By Yourself
So how do you do this stuff?
For fastest progress and best results I really recommend you to create your own self-pleasuring practice sessions.
During sex it’s way too hot, and it’s 10X harder to control yourself.
The other tip is: don’t use porn.
Porn also has similar influence over your brain — it simply overstimulates your brain and since it’s external, you’ll find it hard to be in control of it.
I cannot count the times when I got overconfident, checked some porn and found myself full in sticky stuff and failed edging practice.
Note: If you find it hard to get hard by yourself, just wait for few days. Ideally you would practice edging when you’re horny.
So you get comfortable, make sure there are no distractions.
You get yourself hard, close your eyes and really feel the sensations.
Think of your hardness in terms of 1 to 100.
1 is you’re completely limp, like you would be ashamed if someone saw how tiny your penis is.
100 is you’ve ejaculated.
Edging is when you get yourself to 90… and then relax yourself back to 60–70.
You repeat this enough times till you can go to 95… 97… and relax yourself back to 70–80.
Your goal is to learn your own arousal levels and find ways to get yourself under control when you get too close to the edge (or the so called of point of no return).
How do you calm yourself down?
There are several ways, but the most popular and the most powerful tools you have are: kegels and your breath.
You’ll need to strengthen your kegel muscles if you want more control over your penis. It’s like gym for your penis.
Kegel muscles are the ones you use to stop peeing.
The easiest way to strengthen and isolate them is actually when you’re taking a leak. Ancient taoists practice it there and used toilet as a trigger for them to practice kegels.
You basically start peeing, then squeeze your kegels for 5 secs, then release.
Repeat it for 4–5x till your bladder is empty. Then as you wash your hands hold your PC muscle for 10 extra seconds.
Do this for a month… and you’ll see great results.
The more you do it, the more control you’ll have over your penis erection.
Back to edging exercise…
You get yourself hard and then you squeeze your kegel muscles for 10–15 seconds and repeat till you’re limp.
Additionally you can open your eyes (it helps for some reason) and start the deep breathing.
Your goal is to take your mind… and blood away from your penis and arousal.
By squeezing kegels and your butt you do just that.
By breathing and focusing on your breath (3 counts in, 3 counts out) you move your mind away sexual thoughts.
Do this for a while and you’re ready to take your first trial by fire.
Have sex and last as long as you want!!!
Note: It’s also fun to not touch penis at all and play with the prostate milking… (which can be upgraded to even hands-free way…if you’re into that sort of thing with help of a fucking machine.
Also you can practice using blowjob machines.
They simulate the blowjob, sex process and give a lot more intense sensations than simple masturbation would.
It’s a pleasurable way to practice, and it’s much closer to actual sensations you might have in sex, so if you want to last longer — it will serve as the next difficult level for your edging mastery:
Thankfully there are some great extra additional techniques to help you out.
Top 5 Edging Techniques:
#1 — Squeeze Technique
This is the one from the practice.
You have sex as usual, but once you feel getting too close you either completely take your penis out from her or stay shallowly in her.
It’s important to have her cooperation however. If she’s actively thrusting and keeps going when you’re too hot, she’ll push you over the edge.
Anyway… you squeeze your penis, butt, legs, jaw and hold it for as long as it takes you to relax.
You can hold your breath too if it helps. When you hold your breath your body goes in mini emergency mode and brings blood back to main organs (away from penis).
This is effective technique, but its biggest flaw is that you’re completely stopping. It can murder her arousal… Especially if she was close.
Not good.
Bonus tip: You can turn this stopping into your advantage by adding some dirty talk..
Say to her — Oh, I don’t want you to cum just yet… or Damn, you’re making me too hot, you’re such a sexy tease…
#2 — Relax Your Penis
I’ve read somewhere that relaxed penis cannot ejaculate.
And I tried it… it’s true. Semen gets ejaculated with involuntary penis contractions.
So if there are no contractions — voluntary or involuntary…
You won’t ejaculate! As simple as that!
Try it — when fucking her simply relax your penis and make sure it stays that way. You’ll find that you’ll be able to thrust her for far longer than usual.
#3 — Breathing Technique
Breathing technique is my favorite natural edging technique.
It doesn’t even require kegels. But when you master it, it’s crazy powerful.
Breathing in combination with penis relaxation is explosive combination.
What you want to do is to find a calm, relaxed rhythm of breathing and stick to it.
If you observe yourself then when you’ll notice that right before ejaculation your heartbeat increases, your breath becomes shallow… and BOOM!
You’re out of the game.
Your mind follows your body.
Walk confidently with your chest out and you’ll feel more confident.
Cross your arms together, put your head and back down and you’ll feel depressed.
You can trick your mind the same way with ejaculation control.
Attempt to keep thrusting in regular rhythm, not increasing the pace, keeping your penis relaxed and having long, deep breaths in and out the diaphragm (your belly).
You’ll be stunned how much longer you can last, and how much self-aware you’ll become.
#4 — Change Positions
So this is the variation from squeeze technique.
Instead of pulling it out when you get too close to the edge…
You simply change the position to less stimulating one.
Unfortunately I cannot recommend many positions because every man is different. But the least stimulating sex position for men is missionary with her on top.
There gravity helps you out and her vagina isn’t stimulating the head of your penis too hard.
Alternatively you can also simply go down on her, eat her out, finger her… Mix things up..!
She wont even notice that you were close to ejaculating!
#1 —” Too long can be as bad as too short; don’t forget to check in with your partner!”
Great insight for a woman of how lasting too long actually may backfire…
“This may be unpopular I just wanted to add in one element, which is to be aware of whether your partner actually wants sex to last that long or whether it may become uncomfortable or painful, or even just plain boring, for them after a while.
Long-duration sex is not necessarily more pleasurable, for either party, than short-duration.
As a girl, personally my pleasure & satisfaction is maximum in sessions that are really only about 10 min long. I’ve finally realized that the longer it goes on after that, the worse it gets.
I run out of juices, I go dry, my joints eventually start hurting like frickin’ hell, and even if the pain isn’t too bad I start thinking about other stuff I want to do that night…
I just plain get bored. (And if I haven’t come in the first 10 min, realistically I’m not going to, because eventually my clit goes kinds numb).
I mean, I’ll soldier on if it’s what my partner is into, but it definitely gets to the point where it feels like a chore.
I say all this because I actually ended up pretty skittish about long sessions due to a partner who would just plow on and on and on, dutifully, him thinking that was what guys are supposed to do and that girls must prefer that, me getting more and more sore, tired and uncomfortable.
But who wants to be the girl who says “This is no fun anymore, can you please stop”?
Nobody, that’s who!
So though I tried to hint how negative it was all becoming, the last thing I wanted to do was come across sex-negative and/or unappreciative of his efforts, so it was really hard to communicate clearly about it.
Anyway, as long as your partner & you are both happy and satisfied, it’s not necessarily the best course of action to try to last longer just for the sake of lasting longer.”
#2 —” I’m a huge fan of edging my wife (and so is she). I don’t see much on here about edging girls, so here’s how we do it…”
“I’m not sure when we started doing it, but I’m pretty sure it was early on. My girlfriend (now wife) really only liked to cum once in an “encounter”.
She’s capable of having more (our record is 5, and for a girl that likes having 1, that was pretty intense) but usually we just got one a piece. After a while, I added edging her to make her one orgasm even more spectacular (and usually mine gets even better too).
So, I started one night by telling her to let me know when she was about 75% there. I’d read somewhere that that would help her feel more in-tune with where she was on the orgasm scale and you could work up to get even closer. I usually start after some good foreplay by going down on her, and use 2 fingers inside doing the ol’ g-spot come hither thing.
We’ve built up to where she’ll have me stop when she’s about 90% there, like one more lick or stroke and she will cum. I’ll get her close a time or two, and then I’ll slide up, and enter her with the “D”.
Usually, she’s sensitive enough that I can get her close again after a hand-full of strokes.
Sometimes, I’ll let her calm down more than that, kiss her breasts , caress her skin, then I’ll edge myself by fucking her. Then I’ll go back down and tease a time or two.
We’re lucky because she can have an orgasm from penetration and everything else, so I’m not limited to what I choose to do, but I totally love going down on her. Like addicted to it.
I’ve used dildos and tongue, dildos and vibrators, vibrators alone, fingers… Well basically any thing you can think of, I guess I’ve tried it.
No egg plants, haven’t tried egg plants yet, but you get the idea.
One thing I have noticed is that after a wonderful amount of edging her, she gets extremely tight. We can both feel every edge and ridge in each other, and it’s amazing.
As for the orgasm, sometimes I stay going down, especially if she’s into it, and have even had her squirt a bit from it.
Usually, however, we both like to cum while we are fucking.
It’s usually especially intense because one way or another we’ve both been edging for a while.
I hope that gives folks a cool idea to try. Have a great weekend.
Summary:
Tease your girl until she almost cums by whatever means necessary, then stop.
Lather, rinse, repeat until she and you can’t handle it.
This is a word of warning, when you get too taken away with edging.
I experienced something similar, yet not that intense. I felt pain in belly and it went away after few hours. The reason it was painful was because I really edged too hard, too long and confused the heck out of my penis.
Better not get too close to the edge or it WILL backfire.
“A girl on Saturday night was into edging which was great because I usually am too. Two hours in, which isn’t even the longest I’ve gone but it was a lot of denials,
I felt a weird tightness before climaxing and then, once I did, I had the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my right testicle. I’m a moron so I took 4 Advil and got back into bed.
I woke up the next morning feeling a lot better but it still felt tight and heavy… spent Sunday and Monday icing my balls and scaring myself with googling the possibilities.
Went to the doctor yesterday. Turns out to be swollen ejaculatory ducts which can mimic the feeling of acute testicular torsion.
Apparently common but I’ve never heard of it.
The doc told me that I was lucky as people have come in with way worse from edging.
Anyway.. just wanted to warn everyone to be careful if you’re into edging or orgasm denial.
#4 — “Masturbation is 100x better now that I’ve (female) started edging”
“I’m a woman in my mid twenties.
I started masturbating a little later than some; I didn’t have my first self-induced orgasm until I was 19 (the same day I found the porn side of tumblr).
For the first couple years of figuring out masturbating, my orgasms were awesome. Drawn out, legs trembling, flushed all over.
I would sleep like a baby afterwards.
I started to explore porn more and really dialled in what my kinks were.
Everything was new and exciting. In terms of method, I stuck with what worked: fingering my clit steadily until I orgasmed.
When I first started, it would take about an hour to come, but as I got more familiar with myself and what got me off, that was reduced to 40 minutes, then 30, and then suddenly I found myself able to get off in under 10 minutes.
Honestly, I was kind of proud of myself for a while — orgasms were easier to achieve, and that’s a good thing right?? Not…really, it turns out.
Maybe a couple years ago I realized that orgasms just weren’t as satisfying as they used to be. It felt like they were stopping short.
The flush was brief, the tingling didn’t go all the way down to my toes anymore. I was barely panting. It was frustrating and confusing.
I thought maybe it was my fingers. Maybe everyone graduates to toys and I just had missed the memo.
So I got myself my first vibrator. It was…fine. Honestly, nothing much changed. So I got a fancier one that doubled as a dildo.
Meh. I honestly found them more distracting than anything.
Then, around six months ago, I read a post on one of the NSFW subs. It was about a guy working on lasting longer with his partner.
He said that once he started edging, not only was sex longer, but his orgasms were better. I would say that about half clicked with me — I didn’t really see my problem as premature ejaculation, even though it basically was!
To me, the goal of masturbating was to orgasm as efficiently as possible (why did I think that??).
Not long after that, I read a book about the psychology of sex (Come As You Are By Emily Nagoski). I read it more for shits and giggles, because sex is fun and interesting; I didn’t expect to have any life-altering realizations.
Fortunately, the author really hammered home the idea of edging as a tool to understand your own orgasm better. She specifically said that you should edge until you get to the point where you can’t help but orgasm, even without direct stimulation.
My reaction was not far off from, “ok…sounds fake, but ok…”
SPOILER ALERT: it was not fake.
In the last few months, my orgasms have been…fucking unreal. And I’m having cascading orgasms for the first time in my life.
I get excited to masturbate. I wish I had the words to capture how…otherworldly it is to feel yourself starting to come without anything touching you.
And know that you just can’t stop it. It completely changes the game to suddenly think about your orgasm as something you want to delay as long as possible.
It always used to feel like a grind — masturbating was fun but, c’mon, get to the good part already. That impatience just slowly ruined it for me.
Now, coming is against the rules, it’s forbidden, it’s so hot. i’m also feeling more spontaneously turned on now — whereas before I would have tentatively categorized myself as someone with a “reactive” sex drive.
It seems like I am more aware of my clit and my clit is more aware of me.
I hope this helps anyone in a similar masturbatory rut.
#5 — “my gf is slowly becoming an expert at edging me and it drives me fucking wild!”
“I’ve always loved the old stop-and-go when I’m taking care f myself. I made it no secret to my current girlfriend when she was giving me blowjobs or handjobs to replicate this.
I think she’s a quick learner, super quick and has fucking mastered the damn art. She’s even lately started taking pride in her work, bless her!
I used to think going at it for 5 mins, giving a break, repeating a couple times more was mind-blowing, but the first time she kept me going past five times and a good half hour.
That mixed with reducing the intensity of stroking as I came closer and closer until she was barely moving, I was almost ready to throw her off and finish the job myself.
I told her this, and the next time we try, these handcuffs magically appear out of nowhere. I’m now completely at her mercy and she fucking knew it.
At one point, I was literally air-humping to get release.
I think I’m really fortunate to have someone like this who likes a challenge, and who enjoys this as much as I do.
You know the man version of kegels, where the dick kinda flops around a little — I actually ended up having to ruin my own orgasm like that once because she got so close and it was so frustrating.
The next step might be some sort of orgasm denial, chastity stuff, but I’m terrified at how good she’ll get. I still want to get off 🙂
Here’s to all the ladies that can read us like a book and fully use that knowledge.”
For me it absolutely makes the orgasm stronger when I finally go over the line. It is also intensely frustrating and extremely difficult for me to do to myself.
I can sometimes manage to stop once but after that the psychological urge to orgasm becomes overwhelming.
But I’ve had guys pull me back from the edge 3–4 times before letting me orgasm, and the resulting orgasms were fabulous.
But being stopped on the brink, especially more than once, actually isn’t that much fun.
Despite the resulting intense orgasm, there is no way I’d want to do it every time.
“For background, I’ve been dating my girlfriend for about three years now.
Our sex life has always been very good, especially when we first started dating — three to four times a day sometimes.
Now, we have sex several times a week, depending on our schedules.
But, in the past few months, due to us having pretty different schedules and increasingly busy lives, we’ve been having less, and not as good sex.
I noticed that I was more often not in the mood than she was (this has happened to me in previous long term relationships as well), and when we did have sex, it was usually pretty quick and not as mind blowing as it had been a few years back.
I wouldn’t say our sex life was bad, but I knew it could be better.
About a week ago, I decided to try an experiment: Every day, when I’m alone, I spend ~10 minutes watching porn and masturbating, BUT I never finish.
(I actually don’t always watch porn at the same time, but it made the title sound better. Also, I almost always make sure the last thing I look at is my personal folder of pics of my girlfriend).
I only let myself cum when I’m having sex. The results have been incredible — I’ve been crazy horny all week.
We’ve had sex way more than usual this week, and it’s been incredible every time. I’m learning my limits as well, which means I can last longer and focus more on her.
Also, more sex has resulted in more intimacy, cuddling and a better relationship overall.
Again, not that or relationship was bad, but it’s great now 🙂
It’s only been a week; we’ll see how it goes further on.
I have noticed I’ve had a harder time focusing on work and chores this week, which is an unfortunate side effect.”
“I do it occasionally. But to be honest my willpower is so shit that whenever I start an edging session — it’s almost always an orgasmic session, lol!
Fortunately as a woman I don’t have a refractory period as severe as many guys do, so I can still have sex afterwards.
But it tends to be better if I haven’t cum for a while.
So I tend to find that unlike “direct” visual stimulation like porn, more indirect forms like reading blogs (or, ahem, certain subreddits) works better for me.
It doesn’t get me so worked up that I can’t help but go for it, but on the other hand it keeps me aware of my sexuality (plus it’s hella enjoyable!).
