Fisting is becoming a thing, a game, a fun thing to do together or by yourself. The satisfaction when you stretched yourself and got filled well by the next gigantic toy is out of the world.
But nothing replaces the feeling of first time fisting done by your partner. It can be lots of pleasure, but only if done right.
It's not as easy as porn would like you to believe, and doesn't necessary need to be painful. This guide will tell you how to practice this extreme fisting art:
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What is fisting?
Here's Wikipedia's definition of fisting:
“Fisting, handballing, fist-fucking, brachiovaginal, or brachioproctic insertion is a sexual activity that involves inserting a hand into the vagina or rectum.
Once insertion is complete, the fingers are either clenched into a fist or kept straight.
Fisting may be performed without a partner, but it is most often a partnered activity.”
And how is it actually possible? Here's a story that explains it well:
"I fist my wife once or twice a month. If I immediately go to PIV sex after, she is looser for sure. Wait an hour or two, and it's back to normal.
The vagina is basically muscle tissue.
Stretching like this - as long as you don't cause actual tears - is nothing more than exercise, which as with any muscle, strengthens it. If anything, I've perceived my wife to be tighter after we've gotten into this; I often have to work to get the first finger in, and her ability to squeeze me during sex has improved for sure.
If give her druthers, she almost always goes for normal PIV sex, so I don't think that satisfaction is an issue.
While fisting might be out of the question (without at least a lot of prep and tries) for some women, I can't imagine that four fingers are.
Use lube and patience."
Source: alittlebirdy1
How To Fist A Woman For The First Time?
Since it's most common between ladies — lesbian or straight, I'll focus on the fisting a woman, but it really doesn't matter.
Anal fisting is the same, with the difference that it will take a lot more time and steps to build it up.
Like using a finger, then butt-plugs…to something bigger like a dragon dildo.
In simple steps it could look like this:
- get her relaxed (drink a glass of wine, take shower, meditate)
- trim your nails or just use a glove (recommended, as it will smooth all the edges, hand including)
- get a lube, lots of lube, Sliquid Sassy is the most loved across many couples. Or you can take a look at other popular fisting lubes that pros prefer.
- lay the towel under to cover the potential mess
- get to the action and work it up slowly…!
That's it, it just takes time and patience to get vagina to relax.
Women can get baby through that vagina, so we know it's stretchy!!!
But we don't want it to be painful, that's why we take it slow.
Here are more tips from other people:
“Working up to a fist is all part of the fun! “
“Take your time giving her lots of slow oral while you add more fingers.
I’ve found that the widest part of my hand at four fingers across (flat, not the “duckbill” position) is almost as wide as a full fist, with the added benefit of your thumb appropriately positioned to work her clit and give your tongue a break.
Don’t be shy using more lube than you think is needed, and lay a towel down first if it helps you relax on not focus on destroying the sheets.
It might not happen the first or even second time you try, just keep having fun in the meantime.”
Source: spread0pen
“Lots of lube. When you have too much, add a little.
“Good, thick lube, too — we love Sliquid Sassy for this. Throw original KY Jelly in the trash!
Definitely have the thumb on the asshole side, it makes penetration exponentially easier.
Make a duck with your hand.
It’s not a fist until you get to your wrist. :)”
Source: alittlebirdy1
The best fisting hand positions is a duck with your hand 😉 Except the bird lol.
“For fisting use more lube than you ever imagined.”
“And much more time.
Taking the whole hand in the first try is nearly impossible.
Let however far you get to feel good for her before you continue.
Listen to what she says, there might be times when she wants your hand to be still…
Don’t put your hand in a fist, that’s going to take even more time. Make it as thin as possible.”
Source: backrubbing
“Fisting from behind in doggy is good. The pelvis is usually more open in that position. “
“An alternative to try once in a while might be putting your elbow down on the bed and your firearm straight up.
She could lower onto your hand, after getting super close in a different position.
She could lay on her back while you do most of the stretching, then once at the knuckles, go to lowering onto your hand.
Gloves can sometimes give that 10% extra slide that’ll make the difference. Has silicone lube been tried?
She could stretch on a really thick toy on other days of the week. Frequency can play a role when sizing up gradually over time.”
Source: SmallishBiGuy
Is Fisting Safe?
Yep, totally — if you take your time.
It does help if a woman does kegel exercises and strengthens her pelvic floor muscles.
Kegels are great for both men and women as they are kinda like a gym for your penis or vagina.
What's the pleasure & fun from fisting?
It's the same fun as taking a huge dildo or huge penis.
Some women just love it, they love the fullness of it.
Some love the kinkiness of it, being able to do it in the first place.
It's just yet another shade of sexual pleasures you can get!
And watch this super helpful video from Stevie where different people share their fisting experiences and how to do it:
Helpful Fisting Stories From Real People
Now, it's very hard to predict all your questions and challenges which is why I included several fisting stories from different people.
I hope this variety will answer your questions and you'll know exactly what to do the next time you try fisting.
Cheers:
“Fisted Wife properly”
“I have a smallish dick, well, at least to my wife. (I am 6x5.)
So a couple of years into marriage, we started using big toys and fisting.
We love both, and I recommend fisting if a couple is mismatched like us (wife needs something more).
In the past 5 years or so, I have probably fisted my wife close to 200 times.
She takes it like a champ and has great orgasms from rubbing her clit while I do it.
But even though we are experienced, last night we learned something new.
While I was fisting her, she started saying how she wished my cock was bigger, so I could fuck her properly. (I love this kind of talk.)
So I started fisting her much like she was taking a huge cock, which is to say, much faster than I normally would do, and straight in and out (previously I rotated my hand a little).
Occasionally I pushed deep into her, to press up against the end of her pussy, but for the most part, I was just in and (almost all the way) out rapidly.
She said after about 2 minutes of the quick fisting she was going to come.
And neither of us were touching her clit at all.
Just the rapid fisting was making it happen!
It was hot as hell, and I can’t wait to do it again to see if we can repeat the outcome.
I did tell her to rub her clit when she was about to come, because I didn’t want to risk her having a weak orgasm. She said it was a good one.
After she got hers, I put a snug fit condom on and fucked her loose hole to get mine, thinking about how hot that was.
Source: regular_joe_123
“I fist my wife once or twice a month. If I immediately go to PIV sex after, she is looser for sure. Wait an hour or two, and it’s back to normal.”
“The vagina is basically muscle tissue.
Stretching like this — as long as you don’t cause actual tears — is nothing more than exercise, which as with any muscle, strengthens it.
If anything, I’ve perceived my wife to be tighter after we’ve gotten into this.
I often have to work to get the first finger in, and her ability to squeeze me during sex has improved for sure.
If given her druthers, she almost always goes for normal PIV sex, so I don’t think that satisfaction is an issue.
While fisting might be out of the question (without at least a lot of prep and tries) for some women, I can’t imagine that four fingers are.
Use lube and patience.”
Source: alittlebirdy1
“I’ve recently accorded fisting with my partner. I’m a very tight female and at first 3 fingers was tight. “
“We worked at it for probably 3 weeks or so. 3 separate attempts.
We’re almost there, literally soooo close.
Then I give myself about a week to tighten back up and recover.
It does end up being uncomfortable.
Healing afterward can be a bit sore. But it can be done.
If I could give any advice it would be use TONS of lube.
Like enough to where it’s dripping and making a damn mess.
You can’t have too much. Also she needs to be relaxed.
I’ve noticed that laying on my back with my legs spread kinda “butterfly” like opens up my pelvis the most.
Use pillows to prop her legs or throw one of her legs up onto your arm.
It’s all communication and trial and error.
Go slow take your time get to a point where she can feel it stretching and hold it let your body accept it.
And advice for you google some how-to articles or videos.
It can help you with some techniques.
A BIG tip for you is when you pull your fingers/hand out go very slow don’t just rip your hand out things kinda form around your hand and can cause a bit of suction.”
Source: So_Delicous911
“I get fisted quite regularly. “
“What’s important is a few things for me:
- being wet enough (or lube but I prefer natural lube),
- being aroused enough (not in a wet way but in a relaxed and completely open to it way)
- and tiny hands.
I have had beasts of men who weren’t able to fit, but shorter/smaller guys and most girls do fit.
Also, you have to work up.
I can get 2 fingers directly from the beginning.
Pretty quick after I can have 3 and 4, but adding the thumb take a few minutes, once it’s in it feel so full and tight omg I love it.
Makes the hand feel like a huge dick, but better!
My current girlfriend had little experience with sex and when I told that’s what I like she was horrified :p
But when I reassured her she didn’t hurt me, she went for it and now she absolutely loves fisting me.
She finds is super hot and totally goes for it all the way. So yeah. We’re a fan.”
Source: ShowedMyExMyUsername
“I have experience. I fisted one girlfriend some, and tried it with a few others, but failed. “
“A bigger vagina does help.
The woman I successfully fisted had a slightly bigger vulva and vagina, but it wasn’t loose.
She had muscle tone, but after being with 30 women in my life I can say that her’s was a little above average in size in every way.
My first girlfriend was too, but I didn’t know enough to totally slide in.
She might have read kinky stuff by then, but I was more sheltered. We were….young.
Since then I should have been more patient with the other partners.
I was patient during the session that we tried it, but I should have been patient over weeks and months.
They were close to taking my hand. Some incremental stretching would have done the trick.
Also, your non-dominant hand is usually a tiny bit thinner/folds narrower.
So, if you’re right-handed, give your left hand a try.
Gloves can reduce skin drag and get your hand in a hair more easily.
In most cases, the female pelvis opens widest in doggy position with the knees spread apart some.
On her back, her tailbone might press up a little due to her rear being on the bed.
The woman I fisted hadn’t had a baby yet.
Her vagina was a little bigger simply due to genetics.
In the years following I noticed a slight correlation with vaginal birth and the vagina feeling a little bit bigger, but it wasn’t a 100% guarantee.
There were exceptions in both directions.
I’ve heard women say that having given birth helps, and some say that it makes no difference.
You’ll hear both sides of that coin.”
Source: SmallishBiGuy
“My wife and I have dealt with all of the fisting issues as we have moved from just two fingers all the way to doing double fisting every night now.”
“Let’s address orgasms first.
The best way for orgasms to happen are to use a hitachi on your clit while he is fisting you.
The second way is for him to have his palm up while fisting you and use the tips of his fingers as they are pointed back towards him to rub your g-spot during each in and out stroke.
Losing control or your body, shaking, and/or squirting during this is completely normal.
Also, deep inside the vagina, it is more sensitive to stretching than rubbing.
So, as you begin to loosen (or balloon) with his fist inside of you as you get close to climax, his fist and fingers should begin to open ever so slightly to keep the stretch deep inside.
As time goes on and you continue to grow, this will continue.
When my wife and I first started, her vagina would really squeeze my fist to the point it went numb.
After a time (weeks) I was able to open my fist ever so slightly. Then more and more.
Now I can open it all the way from a closed fist.
Once he gets really good, it becomes possible, and even easy, to give you as many of the strongest orgasms you have ever had pretty much on demand for as long as you want.
Many women have had the surface level orgasm they can get from using a vibrator on their clit. I’m not referring to that.
Very few women on this planet have experienced what it means to have deep orgasm after orgasm after orgasm over and over again until they collapse in exhaustion and are pretty much incoherent.
The downside to this is if you go this hard every night, you will get very sore very quickly.
But, it’s super fun to do every now and again.
Orgasms are really nice to be sure.
However, they are over quickly and can be exhausting to you.
You may begin to find yourself wanting his hand in for longer than the minimum it takes to give you an orgasm.
As you have already noticed, when you set aside the orgasm aspect of it, it still feels really good to have his hand inside. This may grow to be a big portion of your time when you two do this.
For my wife and I, when we first start I will give her an orgasm.
Then after it is done, I keep both my hands inside her and continue to very gently massage and stretch the inside of her vagina while we talk and enjoy the afterglow.
If I stop moving, it tightens up. So, I keep moving very slowly. After a while, sometimes a long while, she may decide she wants another one. Then repeat.
Generally, we do this for a couple of hours almost every night with 1 to 3 or so orgasms in total.
Now for the “pull out agony” issue.
The problem is that the entrance of your vagina closes down around the narrow part of his wrist.
To prevent this closing, it must be kept open. The way to keep it open is to insert 1–2 fingers in at the wrist after the fist is inserted.
This keeps the opening at the same size and prevents is from closing around the wrist.
This also begins you both on the road towards going bigger.
Trust me, if this turns into a daily or several times a week thing, then you will get bigger and that’s ok. The orgasms get better as you do.
As far as getting bigger goes, if you are even slightly sore from the stretching you may feel more than once or twice a week, then that means it’s growing down there.
I’m not saying it doesn’t shrink afterward. I am only saying the maximum size can grow with time and effort.
The average rate is 0.5–1" in diameter per year.
The “pull out agony” portion will eventually fade as time goes on.
After a time (many months), he will be able to put some lube on his hand and very gently be able to slip it right in without any warm up.
The vagina has lots of muscles and it completely closes down in between and has to be worked open each time.
It’s very resilient, adaptable, and strong.
The road you and your boyfriend have started down is an amazing one.
The level of intimacy you and he share will only grow.
With very few exceptions, most couples that do this seem to be bonded extremely tightly together.
Congratulations, you’ve won the lottery.”
Source: curious_joe_2018
Final tips for the first anal fisting
“Watch a few gay pornos first.
It can be amazing for both.
But you need to see some pictures or something. It can be dicey if neither of you has tried this before.
You can do serious damage to the inside of your anus. It should take an hour and longer of working over your hole, massage, and toys.
Yes, toys are very helpful.
You start with small toys and progress to larger, this must be done before a fist can be accepted.
Lube is very important, I use the same lube used for calves, yes, cows.
When cows are pregnant, you must stick your whole arm inside the cow for checkups.
The lube used for that is amazing for fisting.
And trust me, things are going to get messy.
But it’s fun and it’s an amazing experience.”
Source: SOMAboySF
Bringing It All Together
As many people have explained in their stories, fisting can be an extremely bonding sexual venture to take together.
It does require a lot of trust and time to build it up to fisting.
While you saw that different people do it for different reasons, what matters is that you want to experience it!
And now you can.
Would love to hear your stories after you tried it!
Have fun 